


Breaking Walls Down

by aanahitt



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F, M/M, POV Outsider, Post-Apocalypse, Post-Canon, Students, Teaching, University, finding out about your local cryptid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:14:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21795928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aanahitt/pseuds/aanahitt
Summary: After Almost-geddon, Aziraphale and Crowley have to decide what to do with their lives. With vague worries about a future attack from Heaven and Hell, Aziraphale thinks it's only right to arm people.What better way to teach than to, well, teach?
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 73
Kudos: 204





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> The only actual note I have is: I hate coming up with titles. It doesn't mean anything except that I have Girls Like Girls stuck in my head rn.

After Armageddon't has not happened, and after Heaven and Hell both agree to stay away from them, Aziraphale and Crowley moved to the South Downs, in a cottage, which was all well and good in that it allowed the angel and demon to finally say aloud what both had known, to whisper to each other, both still fearfully looking over their shoulders for retribution and braving the words out nonetheless, the most meaningful and meaningless of phrases, "I love you." It was considerably harder for them to move everything from their respective London residences into the small place; Aziraphale stockpiling his vintage wines and precious knick knacks while Crowley searched for open windows before which to set his plants, all of whom had been sternly warned ahead of time not to dare to lose so much as a leaf through the trauma of relocation. Crowley's throne found no room when they had enough chairs for the both of them around the smaller table that fit into the dining room, and Aziraphale left the majority of his books in the store he had permanently closed. Crowley moved his bed into the bedroom and tempted Aziraphale into napping for the first time in a few centuries, but just the once. They set wards around the cottage, and wards around those, and even more wards in front of those ones. Aziraphale blessed a container of holy water that he warned Crowley not to open, and Crowley tucked a smoldering ember containing hellfire into the fireplace, 'just in case', and they firmly pretended they weren't still looking over their shoulders for retribution every time they held hands.  
Aziraphale picked up his sword for the first time since King Arthur's time[1] and he persuaded Crowley into learning to fight too[2].  
The days turned into weeks, the weeks turned into months, and Crowley took out the oldest wine in his collection as the six-month-anniversary of the Nope-ocalypse came around, and the two finished it with their new friends Anathema and Newt, who had happily settled into Jasmine Cottage together, and who had kept in touch mostly from curiosity's sake at the start, but had well and truly found enjoyable company between each other. That was the first night they didn't double check the wards - though Crowley went out to do so first thing the next morning, and Anathema added an alarm system to the whole affair before leaving so they would know if the wards were tampered with.  
It took another two and a half months for the fear of pursuit to leave them long enough that they spent an entire night concentrating on just the two of them and a few good bottles of wine. The two celestial beings didn't spend the time in physical coupling, but instead put in a good few hours of wing grooming and petting. After the third bottle of wine they were opening themselves to each other on the celestial plane, and it was after the fourth that they found a much more preferable form of coupling than what their physical forms could do.  
Aziraphale felt a touch of brimstone at the edges of his spiritual being after, while Crowley could taste the touch of ozone after a spring rain.  
Aziraphale didn't Fall, and he decided then that clearly the Almighty was in full approval of everything he'd done. There was no way he would have gotten away with everything they'd done had it not been Her will, and he most definitely should have Fallen by now if his relationship with Crowley was unapproved.  
The scent of brimstone at the edges of his being had faded by the morning, but the next time they intertwined it lasted the whole day afterward, and Aziraphale pulled the sense of _Crowley_ tight around him like a blanket.  
Crowley didn't let it fade after that, liking the feeling of being branded by his angel in a way anyone - well, anyone not completely mundanly human - would be able to tell with a good look. Aziraphale had nothing to complain about either, and they spent many a night, wings out and in full embrace, safe on the celestial plane in their fortress of a cottage, as close as any two beings could possibly get.  
Aziraphale was the one who realized the traces of each other were not a surface change.  
It happened thus; Aziraphale, ever on the lookout for a good first edition occultist book, heard of several of "That sort of thing" being offered by a person cleaning out an attic that had been left in disrepair for several years. The sale, such as it was, was to have been carried out in the house of the now deceased witch, a house which, Aziraphale realized soon after arriving, had been warded properly against demons.  
It was a ward Aziraphale found himself unable to cross, for the taste of Crowley, wrapped so warmly around him, had been detected by the spell.  
Aziraphale went home without the book, but with an idea.  
He discussed the matter with Crowley, and even tested several wards which brought the same result, but Aziraphale suspected something eminently more useful; he was proven right when Crowley - unwilling to let Aziraphale risk even the slightest bit of harm to himself - put a single drop of holy water on the end of his pinky.  
And felt nothing.  
Aziraphale then went to pick up the ember of hellfire, and didn't burn.  
And so, after eight and a half months they gained the immunity they'd pretended at the Not End of the World, and they relaxed just the slightest bit more.  
By the end of the ninth month after, they'd learned a lot of occult knowledge that would be useless to anyone else, but that had interesting theological bases that Anathema, at least, found fascinating. They found there were some things you needed to be _all_ demon - or angel - to do, like dying in Holy Water or creating hellfire, and some things you needed to be only a little demon to do, like being recognized by wards, summonings, and other spells.  
It was a full year after Armagedon't, after a party with the Them and the newly engaged couple - and, of course, some slightly confused parents who went along with their children's plans - that Crowley, inspired by Anathema's engagement, asked Aziraphale if they couldn't make it permanent (And if he was also inspired by the wish to keep Aziraphale safe even if something happened to him, well, that was his own business).  
Aziraphale, considering not only the safety of the most important person in his life, but also the forever that they wanted to make of their lives agreed.  
And Aziraphale and Crowley became the first angel and demon to mate across the lines of heaven and hell, to mate at all, and their wings shimmered and changed with them, the primary feathers gaining the other's coloring, so that Aziraphale had black edged red on the outer edges of his wings and Crowley had white edged with palest blue.  
And it was after this net of safety, after a year of no pursuit or oversight, that they seriously began asking, "what do we do with the rest of our lives?"

***

"I don't know." Aziraphale said, one week after the anniversary of Armagedon't, after their mating, prepping a good lunch for the two of them. "I just feel like we could be doing more than eating out, reading books, and drinking wine."  
"And tending my plants, and driving down to the Ritz," Crowley supplemented. "What, not enjoying retirement, angel?"  
Aziraphale sighed. "I suppose so. Aren't you bored?"  
Crowley looked around the cottage, then sighed. "Yeah, I s'pose."  
"And I keep wondering, what's next? Should we do something to prepare? Do you really think Heaven and Hell are going to go after humanity?"  
"Of course. Look at them so hell bent to go after each other. Only reason they haven't gone after Earth specifically is they didn't realize it _was_ its own thing. Now they do. Now they have someone to fight."  
Aziraphale nodded and put the carbonara onto the table. "Well, we need to do something then," he said firmly. "We need to prepare."  
"Angel," Crowley said, exasperation in his voice. "It could take another six thousand years. We have more than enough time to relax and sleep and dine out." He came to lounge in a chair at the table, taking just a little of his mate's food to try it, but mostly having wine. "If you want to do something, you could consider actually running a bookstore. With, you know, the selling the books part."  
Aziraphale sent Crowley a Look as he began to eat. "Think about it, my dear. If Heaven or Hell did anything right now, humanity would be defenseless. They would be too startled by the thought of angels _existing_ to even start to create a way to fight them off."  
"So, what? You're going to go on the internet and preach against angel -kind? Seems rather, I don't know.... you know, you're not wrong, but it doesn't seem right? I'm sure there's a word for it. Also not your style."  
"Oh, goodness, no. But something should be done, shouldn't it? No one believes in anything miraculous anymore."  
"Well, yeah. Especially with the whole 'limit on miracles' thing. This is delicious, angel."  
"Oh." Aziraphale smiled. "Thank you. Maybe if we just talked to a lot of people, tried to teach them about... well, that's a thought. We could become professors. I could teach literature."  
Crowley seemed about to shoot the idea down, but he paused. Aziraphale could tell he was thinking everything over, the different angles and possibilities, so he drank his wine and finished his plate and let him think.  
"I think that may be a good idea," Crowley eventually came out with. "You can teach Literature and I'll do History, and we can act normal. You know, for us. _Someone_ will eventually notice, with the way you talked to literally every author -"  
"And the many times you got your portrait painted by the masters?"  
"Exactly!" Crowley grinned and his pupils dilated in excitement and he looked rather dorky and adorable with it. "They'll earn the knowledge themselves. And you know I always enjoy giving people some good perspective."  
Aziraphale _did_ know, considering a mix of Crowley giving humanity the knowledge of good and evil and himself handing off his flaming sword made it through a lot of versions of mythology.[3] "Perfect. It'll be fun."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 Just to stay in practice, of course, and to have something to do.[return to text]
> 
> 2Just to have someone to spar with, you understand.[return to text]
> 
> 3While a lot of the stories were incredibly positive about the affair, the knowledge that it had been a Wrong Thing To Do managed to make it into most mythologies as well. Crowley had joked about him being Prometheus once, and Aziraphale had shuddered at the thought of the divine punishment the humans had come up with for that one.[return to text]
> 
> ***
> 
> Heya everyone who happened to stumble onto this and thought it might be interesting - I hope you're right! :P Don't know how I'll post but the story is written, I just need to edit it.  
> Most of it will not be from Aziraphale's or Crowley's POV, but I always feel the need to set the story, as it were, so here we are.  
> Leave me a comment or a kudo! Those brighten my day like nothing else. Is there anything like the rush of dopamine from someone authentically enjoying themselves because of you? No. No there is not.


	2. Allison

Allison sighed as she traipsed into her first class of the semester, dropping a heavy bag onto the seat next to hers and rummaging for her textbook and note taking journal.  
She had too many journals, but that was probably the curse of anyone who liked to write, and as she was majoring in Literature, with a minor in journalism so she could actually use the degree, she definitely liked to write.  
"Hey!"  
Allison looked up as a far too perky for an 8 am class girl sat in the seat to her other side.  
"Hi."  
The girl beamed and Allison's heart skipped a beat. "I'm Val. Are you excited for Medieval History? I'm so ready, I heard Professor Crowley is the best kind of disaster gay."  
Allison raised her eyebrows. "Oh?" How many cups of coffee did the girl have this morning?  
She nodded. "My friend took his class last year when he'd just started, so we might be in for something more organized but -"  
The door to the classroom flew open and a man entered. He was dressed all in black with black sunglasses and he had a small tattoo of a snake below one ear and flaming red hair. The snake motif continued into snakeskin boots and a belt. It must have taken a miracle for him to get into women's jeans that tight, Allison thought as the man leaned against the table in front of the classroom.  
"Definitely a disaster gay," Allison agreed under her breath, and Val giggled.  
She was proven right as the teacher ran them through the syllabus - the 'about me' page only had two bullet points: _I'm not taking my glasses off_ and _I don't answer personal questions_. The course had no assigned textbook, though he'd included a link to some videos of medieval festivals and villages, and the office hours of his husband who "loves old books and will help you look shit up" (it was 11 to 12 every day).  
At least she didn't have to wonder what would be on the tests, she thought. It would have to come from lectures.  
He also powered through the academic policies with literally nothing more than "and the usual, blah, blah, blah" before turning to the students and asking "any questions?"  
He frowned at a student who raised their hand, but nodded for them to go on.  
"Um, what are your office hours?" the kid asked.  
Professor Crowley peered through his syllabus. "Huh. Guess that's not in there. You can come see me Mondays and Fridays, from four to five. Room L200R."  
Allison stared at him. No one would want to stay late to go to office hours, especially not on a Friday. Although, she doubted anyone had other classes scheduled that late, so that was a plus.  
"Any _other_ questions?" the professor asked, looking incredibly like he didn't want that to be the case.  
No one raised their hand this time.  
"Great. Then you can get out early today and we'll start the actual lessons tomorrow. Go on, I have to do this three more times today."  
There was a rush of motion as everyone packed up to leave. Allison ended up heading out with Val, who, she'd found out, was taking Arthurian Legends with her at 2.  
"It's with Professor Crowley's husband," Val had told her. "Professor Fell."  
Allison nodded. "Loves old books. That makes sense, I guess. What else do you have?"  
"Political Economics and Migratory Law. I'm going to go into politics, but I couldn't resist the whole medieval thing for this semester, and I do need a fun, high level English elective."  
"Agreed. I just hope history isn't too hard, but I think if we can follow his lectures it should be fine. It's not like there's a textbook to read."  
At that point they had to part ways to go to their separate classes, before joining up for lunch at 12. Allison worried with her hair for a good ten minutes before deciding there was nothing to be done about the fact that she had just rolled out of bed that morning. She hurried to meet Val in the lunch room, to find her new friend already talking with another girl.  
Her heart fell, but she came over with a smile when Val waved her over, and introduced Sophia, the student who had taken Professor Crowley's class the year before, and shared their lunch time.  
The three of them settled at a table, and after her initial wariness, it was nice and calm and comfortable. Sophia was quiet but good natured, and was working on a history degree. Val and Allison left together for their English class after lunch and settled into the front row, looking at Professor Crowley's husband, who was sitting at the table, reading as he waited for everyone to file in. Professor Fell looked gentle, and he had a light neutral aesthetic with a tartan bow tie and pale blonde curls.   
The way the two went through the syllabus was as different as their appearances. Professor Fell talked at length about his love of books and classics and how that had led him to teaching, while touching on his husband[1] and his house[2]. They meandered through what they were going to learn and had a list of ten "suggested reading books" as well as a required book on King Arthur and the historical context, though he would add any text that he managed to remember as they talked about specific points.  
Allison was probably most shocked that one person could remember that many books on one topic, let alone have read them all.  
When he asked for questions he did it with a smile that was a stark contrast to his husband's obvious annoyance with them.   
"I'm going to have no idea what will be on his tests," Allison lamented after class ended. "But I think I'm going to learn way more than I expected."  
Val chuckled. "Yeah, I think so too."

***

The first two week of classes flew by as Allison did her best to keep up. She'd taken the Arthurian Legends class hoping it'd be easy and interesting, and it was definitely interesting. Professor Fell talked about the time period for the first week, England's political and social state during that time period. They even talked about the things the Roman Empire left behind when they left. Allison was hopelessly _fascinated_.  
But there was just _so much information_. She wasn't even sure what was important because Professor Fell talked about every thing with the same level of interest and excitement. He must have studied it so well, because he talked about it all as if he'd been there and seen the castles and troops that he talked about. They'd spent a whole day just talking about armor.  
It was one thing that he had in common with his husband, because Professor Crowley sauntered through topics with little commonalities beyond them being in the same time period. They might not have been assigned a textbook, but she was sure her and Val's notes could create one with a good edit. Every time a student asked a question it would open a completely tangential talk that would take them through the rest of the hour.[3]  
Her other classes were also intense, but at least they were slightly less chaotic. She was taking Intro to Survey Research and Principles of Reporting, so she had a full load of 300 level classes.  
They weren't nearly as interesting, and if she hadn't been concerned about job offers, she would have switched to history to learn more about the world the married disaster couple were painting for her.  
Sophia and Val became fixtures in her school life, and at the end of the first week she introduced two of her journalism classmates to the group; a girl named Eve and a boy named Will who settled into the group like they were made for it.  
Sophia was actually TAing another one of Professor Crowley's classes, and confirmed he was just as chaotic in the other, but apparently he knew just as much about ancient cultures as he did about Medieval Europe.  
Allison could only dream of knowing so many subjects in such depth, or having the kind of relationship they did. She'd seen Professor Crowley come to pick up his husband after class one day and it had been the sweetest thing ever. Professor Crowley had acted 'cool', Professor Fell had been smitten, and they'd held hands as they walked out as if it was both a shock and an honor that they were able to do it at all.  
Of course, on Friday this was impossible, as Professor Crowley had to wait for his office hours to finish. But that didn't mean, in Allison's opinion, that it was acceptable for Professor Saxe to waltz in after class was over and look at Professor Fell _like that._  
Allison looked over at Val when it happened, exchanging a Look[4] as Professor Saxe walked over to lean against Professor Fell's desk.  
"Hello Aziraphale," Professor Saxe said. "You have a few hours now, right?"  
"Oh, yes, I suppose I do." Professor Fell gathered his papers into his bag, sparing Professor Saxe one of his smiles. Professor Fell's smiles always made the room a little brighter, but that didn't mean he was _interested_. He smiled at everyone like that. "Are you finished with classes as well?"  
Allison pulled out her phone and messaged the group, because she had to complain.

 **Allycat:** will, saxe is a homewrecker. get your teacher in hand

 **EternallyTired:** whos he homewrecking?

 **Silverback:** hes trying to chat up fell. i dont think fells noticed hes flirting tho

 **Allycat:** oh no. he got fell onto shakespeare. thats what he gets for flirting with a married man

In front of her, Professor Fell was expounding excitedly about Much Ado About Nothing, gesturing excitedly. Allison had a feeling he might actually go through every production of it that he'd ever seen and their differences and merits. Professor Saxe was making a valiant effort to contribute. Unfortunately Allison and Val had to leave instead of eavesdropping, but she had a feeling he wouldn't be able to keep up.

 **Sophia:** Maybe Fell's noticed and is putting him off by monologuing. He can be a bit of a bastard, you know.

 **Silverback:** fell? a bastard???? how?????

 **Sophia:** Trust me.

 **~Eevee~:** ominous

 **Allycat:** ........... im so concerned......

***

"Oh. My. God." Allison directed a glare at the scene in front of her.  
She, Eve, and Will were headed to lunch to meet the rest of their group and what was going on in front of them but another stupid attempt on Professor Saxe's end to flirt with Professor Fell.  
Allison nudged Will. "Go ask him a question for class."  
Will rolled his eyes. "Maybe let them figure their stuff out on their own, Allison? They're all adults. Besides, if Fell prefers someone who's not a bastard, that's his business."  
"Crowley's not a bastard! I mean, not much," she amended. "And never to Fell."  
"Still their decision," Eve pointed out. "Come on, Allison. If they like each other that much, then you have nothing to worry about, right?"  
Allison frowned at Professor Saxe asking Professor Fell to a "lovely little cafe very close by". "Yeah, I sup-"  
She cut off as Professor Crowley sauntered past their group, heading straight for the spectacle in front of them. He stopped by Professor Fell's side, gently nudging him with a shoulder, and ignoring Professor Saxe as if he didn't even exist, much less was standing next to Fell and in the middle of conversation. Fell turned to his husband and lit up like the fucking sun.  
"Crowley, darling. Finished with class?"  
"Yup." He popped the 'p'. "Ready for lunch?"  
"Of course. Would you like to join?" Professor Fell turned to Saxe. "We can continue our discussion."  
Crowley faced Saxe, who shrunk under the glare Allison could only imagine he was sending him. His whole pose had gone tense and aggressive.  
"Um, actually I have to grade some papers," Professor Saxe excused himself. "Perhaps next time." He hurried away from the history teacher, who watched him go.  
Professor Fell turned to his husband with a slightly amused expression. "Ready to go, my dear?"  
"Mmhmm." Crowley headed off, fingers pushed into his too tight pockets.  
Professor Fell followed and held out a hand. Crowley paused, blushed a deep red, and took his hand. The smile on his face was shy and embarrassed, and Fell beamed back at him.  
"Yeah, ok, they're adorable," Eve admitted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 "really quite kind when he doesn't think people are watching, though he does get so adorably flustered when I try to point it out."[return to text]
> 
> 2 "my darling has just filled it to the brim with plants and it feels like a garden, but it's really not the best humidity for antique books"[return to text]
> 
> 3 Allison had developed a theory that this was why Crowley was so uninviting towards questions asked during class; he was always ready to answer questions in as much detail as requested, and had stayed behind after class for half an hour to help a student. It otherwise didn't really match his intimidating aura, or his glares at potential question askers in class.[return to text]
> 
> 4 It was a Look that clearly communicated between the two of them "What the fuck does this joker think he's doing?", not only because their professors were cute and clearly smitten with each other, but because Professor Saxe was not nearly as cool or interesting or passionate as Professor Crowley, despite his attempts to look nonchalant and suave. [return to text]
> 
> *****
> 
> Woo! Second chapter up! I practically rewrote the entire thing, so it has been an Experience.  
> I love to read your comments! I'll try to respond to them all!


	3. Valery

Val smiled at Allison as the girl flopped into the seat. It was a month into the semester, but they always made it in on time for Professor Crowley's class, despite the early hour. There was no other way to get the information, given the lack of textbook and online materials. You could read someone else's notes, of course, but it wasn't guaranteed to cover the stuff you wanted to hear. Video or audio recording was prohibited, and anyone who tried it was immediately caught and yelled at and thrown out of the class for the rest of the day.  
The students said his ability to catch people was supernatural, and Val could attest to that. She had no idea how he did it, but he'd even caught someone who had had the bright idea to print his notes onto a nutrition label for a bottle of gatorade to cheat on their test.  
She wouldn't have even _thought_ of checking that.  
"Hey." Allison smiled at her.  
Val smiled back. "Hey. How are you feeling?"  
"Like I could down three coffees and still not be fully awake," Allison admitted.  
Val laughed. "I know the feeling. Want to grab a coffee over lunch today? There's a cafe down the street."  
"Sure!" Allison blushed lightly. "I'd love to."  
They had to quiet as Crowley sauntered in in that way only he could, and the lesson hit them like a freight train.  
Val felt her phone buzz and she checked it curiously. That was one thing Professor Crowley didn't bother anyone about [1]. If you missed something, that was the risk you were willing to take, was his theory.  
It was Sophia, messaging the group.

 **Sophia:** We need to meet in private at lunch. I think I'm going crazy.

***

In the end they all ended up in the cafe with coffees and sandwiches.  
"Well?" Will nudged her. "What's the crazy? Why the private meeting?"  
Sophia took a deep breath, looking nervous, staring at her drink. "Ok, so... bear with me here, here, alright? So I've taken Ancient History before, you know? Not with Professor Crowley. But there's... things people know and things they don't, right? So we're talking about Babylon and Crowley starts at, well, the beginning. Like he knows exactly what he's talking about."  
The other four exchanged looks.  
Finally Will asked, "Shouldn't he? He is a history teacher, after all."  
"No!" Sophia took a breath and lowered her voice. " _No one_ knows about the beginning of Babylon. We only know of it from sparse accounts in the early days, like that it was founded by Sargon in 2334 BC. It was probably a minor port. But _that_ Babylon was washed away and the only ruins that remain are from 1792 BC. our knowledge of Babylon starts with Hammurabi and his Code of Law... But not Crowley's. Yesterday we had a whole hour lecture about the reign of kings from 2334 to 1790 BC, and he drew a _map_ of ancient Babylon on the board. I think he looked for one in the like one book he keeps in class for the artwork, and then just shrugged and drew it on the board." She pulled out her notebook and opened it to the designated page and the group clustered close to look at it. "There's no way he should be able to draw that. Or talk about how - where they got the stones or the way succession passed or the exact boundaries of the city."  
Val nodded, letting the dates pass in and out of her brain without leaving much impression past 'old' and 'older'.  
"Maybe you just didn't learn it," Eve said reasonably. "We can search -"  
"I _have_ searched!" Sophia's voice rose towards hysteria. "I was up all night looking for anywhere he could have gotten the information!"  
"Maybe he was making it up," Will suggested.  
Val, Allison and Sophia shook their heads immediately.  
"No way," Val said. "You haven't been to his class."  
"I sometimes feel like he knows everything," Allison admitted. "Or that he can read minds."  
They all quieted at the thought.  
"Here's what we should do," Eve said firmly. "Instead of investigating Mesopotamia, let's investigate _him_. We're three journalists, a law major, and a history grad student. If there's nothing weird about him, maybe he just went to a super recent seminar."  
Sophia nodded nervously. Val didn't think anyone would find anything, but they'd look for her peace of mind. Sophia could hyperfixate on these kinds of things, and this was something they could do to help.  
"What if there _is_ something weird going on?" Will looked between them. "Then what?"  
They exchanged glances, then shrugged unanimously. They'd figure it out if they got there.

***

"I don't even know what to look for!" Allison sighed and tossed the old journals away from herself. "What if they kept a low profile before this? Then we might never find _anything_!"  
Allison had voiced the opinion that if there was something _weird_ about Professor Crowley, it had to include Professor Fell. Val had agreed, but the rest of the group was varying levels of skeptical. Allison and Val, as the only ones to have both Professor Fell and Crowley as teachers, had retreated to plan together. [2]  
"If they've been discreet for however long, why stop now?" Val pointed out. "Either they've always been rubbish at staying undercover, or..." She shrugged. Or Sophia was wrong. "I don't know. Something big happened." She flipped through the book she had open. It was one of Professor Fell's suggested reading books; Val was of the opinion that if there was something "weird" going on, they were probably both around in medieval Europe.  
"Hmm." Allison wriggled closer to her. She seemed ready to believe their professors weren't human, or maybe she just wanted to find something mystical in her life. "Maybe they don't realize they're not being subtle. I mean, if Sophia hadn't already taken the class, no one would have noticed."  
"They would have _eventually,_ if it's information no one knows."  
"Yeah, but what I mean is..." Allison huffed. "Let's say you're an immortal, right?"  
Val nodded, though this was the first time someone had vocalized what the "weird" might be around the two.  
"And you've been around since 2000 something BC. Well, maybe you don't _know_ how much people nowadays know. Like... maybe Professor Crowley actually thinks everyone knows that. It's not like he reads a lot."[3]  
She tapped her pen to her lips. "That's true. Maybe he just assumed it was excavated or something." She looked over to see Allison watching her tap her pen and she blushed.  
They both looked away.  
"So," Allison said in a firm voice, clearly not wanting to talk about it. Val didn't push. "What if we just asked for classification on things people shouldn't know, but that are minute enough they might not know they're not supposed to know?"  
Val looked down at the book she was flipping through. "Well... there's one topic we have enough texts to learn about."  
Allison looked at the book and sighed. "I was really hoping to never open a textbook this quarter."

***

"Look at this!" Val slammed the book down on the table. The group was out at their cafe again, away from prying ears.  
The thing that had really gotten her about this reference was that it wasn't even in the recommended reading list. Professor Fell had simply mentioned it while wandering through the syllabus, but Val had written it down, just in case back then. Now that she and Allison had buckled down to learn everything everyone knew about the Arthurian period - and more importantly _didn't_ know - she was crazy glad she had. Because hidden away in this book - and the other only 'mentioned' books - was a whole chapter on one of the knights, Sir _Aziraphale._ The set up seemed too perfect, especially for what should have been absent minded mentions of books.  
Ok, so they'd noticed the name dropped in a few other books, ones that _were_ on the reading list. And they'd noticed it because it was such a unique name and it was Professor Fell's _first name_. But despite the shared looks of _what if?_ they hadn't truly considered bringing it to anyone's attention until she'd found the description of this particular knight.  
Allison, of course, had been ready to believe. Val was more prosaic, but she couldn't help feeling that there Professor Fell had _meant_ the information to be just past where the usual people would think to search, as if it was almost a test of their devotion to the subject. She wasn't sure she was going for the immortal thing, but _something_ was going on, that was for sure.  
Everyone crowded around.  
"'Sir Aziraphale'," Eve read out loud, pausing there as everyone exchanged looks. "'Was said to have a cherubic face with pale gold curls like a halo around his face, and the clearest of blue eyes. He was considered one of the most pure knights of the round table, though he perilously disappeared from any record following a confrontation with the Black Knight. The Black Knight disappears from the tales after the confrontation as well, and thus it is assumed the two slew each other.'" She stopped before it went into particular exploits and legends. "There are lots of blond curly haired people with blue eyes," she pointed out.  
"Yes, but we've been reading a _lot_ of these and here's the thing," Val said. "Sir Aziraphale is only _mentioned_ in the reading list books, right?"  
"While the not reading list books have at least a section on him," Allison finished. "Like they were specially chosen not to go on about him."  
Eve gave them a Look, but Will nodded.  
"That matches up. Look what I found."  
They all turned to look at him as he pulled out some papers from his backpack.  
"I went through real estate records," he said, ignoring the groans from the other four. "I said I was doing a project on this kind of stuff. Figured if I was going full research mode on this, I'd do it right. Anyway, I talked to some of Fell's old students. I was going to do Crowley, but he apparently has a 'no personal questions' rule, and you two were so certain he'd be involved, I figured it was as good a lead as any."  
The group nodded.  
"Anyway, apparently he ran a book store before he moved down here in Soho, called A.Z. Fell & Co. I found the place on Google Maps, then I went into the history of it. Turns out the store was opened in the 1800s by an A. Z. Fell, which I thought, ok, family name, right? I went to look at the records to see if I could get a first name, and _that's_ when I found _this_." Will beamed at them and gestured to the papers no one wanted to look through.  
"It's the same first name?" Allison hazarded to guess.  
"Oh yeah. But it gets better. The store is 'passed down' to another A. Z. Fell every fifty years. It happens like clock work, and with the same name and everything. It looks like someone was concerned once, I found a note that he was looked into five times over the course of him holding the store, but nothing ever came of it. The tax records were apparently so clean the feds thought it was some kind of front." Will grinned and leaned back. "What do you want to bet there's some sort of conspiracy organization they used to be part of? Maybe 'Aziraphale' is a code name all the way from Arthur times."  
They all sat there quietly, looking from the land records to the Arthurian book.  
"That wouldn't explain the knowledge," Sophia said.  
"It would if they passed it down," Will said with a shrug.  
Allison made a face. "From Babylonian times? I could get behind a medieval era organization, but not from 2000 BC."  
"Immortals makes more sense, then?" Will shook his head. "Why wouldn't they change their names?"  
"Why would such an old and apparently well organized conspiracy attract the attention of the feds?" Val asked. "They could be clones?"  
Eve sent another Look. "Why are clones more likely than the other options?"  
"They aren't. I just thought I'd add options. Like... aliens. Maybe the organization is off planet. Maybe it's in the moon."  
" _Whatever_ they are," Allison said firmly, cutting off the speculation that was really going no where. "I think we can agree there is definitely something 'weird' going on."  
"That's fair," Eve allowed. "It's too bad I don't have any classes with them. I feel like you three are more on the supernatural train than me and Will, and it might be because we haven't actually met them."  
Val gave her a sympathetic look. "Want to sit in on Fell's class today? We're going to ask him stuff that's not in any of the books and see what happens."[4]  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 How he could tell the difference between checking your phone and recording, Val couldn't be totally certain, but he never got it wrong. Allison suspected the black arts.[return to text]
> 
> 2 If stealing Allison for the evening also had to do with the fact Val wanted to spend time with her alone, well, no one could fault her for it.[return to text]
> 
> 3 That was what he maintained, anyway. Val thought that was more of a reputation thing than reality, because no way did someone _that_ smart and _that_ in love with a bibliophile not read.[return to text]
> 
> 4 The class ended up being completely derailed by the question, though the familiarity with which Professor Fell explained his immediate response of "damp" when asked what Arthurian era England would have been like could have been argued as a point towards immortals. [5] [return to text]
> 
> 5 There had been an in depth description of how the armor tended to condense a lot of the fog, which had been _everywhere_ and _always_ and how the leather that had to be worn to protect the body from the edges of the chain mail would get horribly and uncomfortably damp, and the constant drizzle meant that the horse gear never truly dried out except for one to two weeks in the summer, and how the ground absorbed the water so walking across the grounds would always end in water and mud getting into your boots.[return to text]


	4. Will

" - think Professor Crowley stole it."  
Will paused on his search through the library.  
It had been weeks, and they still hadn't decided what to do about The Professors, as the group thought of them. Part of that was that they'd had to shelve the discussion to prepare for mid terms. Allison and Val were going to ace their Arthurian Legends class for sure, after the research they'd been putting into it, but everything else seemed up to the gods. God. Whatever supernatural entities might have an influence on their lives.  
They'd also confirmed that Professor Fell knew more than anyone else about that time, and the group had sat for a few minutes with the realization that that must mean King Arthur was a _real person_ and no one else on Earth knew that for a certainty. Or, no one normal, anyway.  
Now that mid terms were over, they were back to worrying at it. Will and Eve had been practicing good journalism practices, and unearthed a flat that had belonged to a Mr. Anthony J Crowley just 15 minutes away from Professor Fell's old store, except that Professor Crowley hadn't even bothered with the farce of "passing it on". It'd just been owned by one person for two hundred years.  
Sophia and Allison said that argued for immortality, while Val had begun to suspect time travel. Eve had pointed out that organization and code names was still on the table, and Will was holding out for aliens, if only because that would be rather exciting. [1]  
So it was no surprise that the Professor's name made him arrow his attention to the two boys huddled around a desk.  
"Oh god, not this again," groaned the second boy. "Crowley couldn't steal anything in 1653!"  
"You've seen the picture!"  
Will, already on alert, perked up even more. A _picture_?  
"According to science there's seven people with your same exact face _right now_ , much less over the course of history."  
"And the same tattoo?"  
The second boy waved his hand. "You can't even see it clearly."  
"Same location."  
Will went over and sat down next to the students, who startled at his presence.  
"Sorry, couldn't help but overhear you guys talking about Professor Crowley." Will looked between them. "Is he your teacher?"  
The boys nodded. "Is he yours?"  
Will shook his head. "But my friends have him _and_ Professor Fell this semester. I've sat in on a few classes. They're something else, huh?"  
"You could say that," the first one said. "I'm Josh."  
"Will." They shook hands before he did the same with the other one, Steve.  
"What's this picture?" Will asked curiously.  
Josh pulled out his phone. "You're going to think I'm crazy," he began. "But I found this sketch of Leonardo da Vinci's and I _swear_ it's Crowley. He even _calls_ him 'Crowley'."  
"Which is a _last name_ ," Steve pointed out.  
Will stared at the picture. It looked _exactly_ like the Professor, wearing black shades and an amused grin. There was definitely a tattoo of some sort below the ear in the sketch, though Steve was right that it wasn't clearly a snake.  
Then again, the picture was pretty small on the phone screen.  
"Where'd you find it?" Will asked, zooming in on the photo.  
"It's called _Leonardo's Notebooks_. You can check it out, if you like."  
"Don't tell me you _also_ think one of our professors is immortal?" Steve said, with the tone of voice of one who has heard a load of nonsense far too often.  
Will just shrugged. "There's definitely something weird about them." He considered telling them about the flat and the bookshop, about the knowledge they shouldn't have, but decided against it. For one thing, he didn't think Steve would appreciate it, and he didn't want to sound like a crazy conspiracy freak. For the other, Will was beginning to feel, especially with the arrival of a portrait by a famous artist, that the facts were rather obvious, if one only cared enough to look for them. Still, he decided to share just one piece of knowledge to explain his interest, and in the spirit of working together. "One of my friends thinks they're part of some shadowy organization, because you know how Professor Fell owned a bookshop? Well apparently he rarely ever sold a book, and the property the store's on is right expensive."  
Josh looked intrigued. "Like they're part of the mafia?"  
"Maybe."  
"That's more likely than the immortality," Steve allowed. "Maybe the tattoo is an identifier or something. And that's probably who took the Manuscript, too."  
Will frowned. "What manuscript?"  
"The Voynich Manuscript. It's a really old manuscript from the 1500s, Italy. The thing had amazing pictures and extensive writing, but no one can read it. People say it's probably in some sort of code, but when it came up in class, Professor Fell said that that's because it was replaced with a fake that doesn't say anything in 1634. It's just scrambled letters now."  
"Damn. Did he say why?"  
Josh shrugged. "Something about how it shouldn't be in circulation. He moved on from it pretty quickly."  
"Weird."

***

"Maybe ask him about it during office hours," Will suggested, flipping through the pages of _Leonardo's Notebooks_.  
"It _would_ be _really cool_ ," Allison sighed. "The Voynich Manuscript is one of the world's mysteries. To be able to see it..."  
Will wasn't nearly as interested in it for its own sake. It was another clue, and he wanted it to fit into the puzzle they'd stumbled upon.  
"But how would we ask? He's not supposed to have it," Val pointed out, the assumption the two would go together a usual thing.  
"Just say someone mentioned he had a copy," Will pushed. "See if he can tell you anything about why he took it. Maybe it has, like, anti - alien stuff in it."  
"I don't think he's a alien," Eve said automatically.   
"Maybe a book spirit of some sort," Allison offered.  
"I could see that," Sophia agreed. "Then what is Professor Crowley?"  
"A werewolf. Or a vampire. Something predatory."  
"You think they're together across species lines, then?" Val asked, eyebrow raised. "Wouldn't that be weird?"  
"Definitely, and they're human-ish, so it's not weird. They're way too different to be the same."  
"Humans can be very different," Eve pointed out. "In fact, they both fall into _totally_ human personalities."  
"That's true," Val agreed. "Nothing about them says 'inhuman'. Not _really_."  
"Which is why we should take a look at the manuscript," Will pushed. "A-ha!" He turned the book around to the group, the page showing the picture of maybe-probably-Crowley. In the picture description on the opposite page, it revealed this was one of several sketches of a man Leonardo had referred to as "my lovesick friend, Crowley". They had included just the one, as a representation of the group.  
Allison whistled. "There's no way that's not Crowley. Look at it."  
"Same last name," Sophia confirmed. She glanced at Eve. "Suspicious."  
"That's awful," Val said. "How can you be so _bad_ at keeping It secret? If they're time travelers, they should know better than to get friendly with famous people."  
"But if they were immortals," Allison rebutted. "They'd have no way of knowing who'd be famous."  
Eve didn't look upset at the stacking evidence against something so blase as a centuries or millenia long mafia type organization. Nor did she look particularly put out that the world might be a far cry from the way she'd viewed it, as a logical and understandable place, just a few weeks ago. Instead, she looked ready for battle. "We need to figure this out. The manuscript is our only other lead, so let's follow it. Let's also see if we can't get the rest of these portraits, just to confirm. If there's something supernatural, I want to know what it is."

  
***

Getting Professor Fell to share the Manuscript was, from where Will was sitting, incredibly easy. Allison and Val went to ask him about it, and next thing _he_ knew they were scheduled to have Professor Crowley bring it in to his office hours on Friday.  
Finding Leonardo's sketches of Professor Crowley was a little more difficult, but only in the sense that it took an actual sum of money to buy a copy of Da Vinci's Paris Manuscript, section G, a treatise on botany that had included a set of three sketches of probably-definitely-Crowley. However it was easy enough in the sense that the book he'd checked out had helpfully told him where the sketches came from, so it didn't exactly smack of research.  
Eve had, however, taken the initiative to google Professor Crowley's name along with other artists, and had gotten a hit on another sketch that was the spitting image of their professor by Michelangelo, though his style had updated with the times during the hundred year hiatus.  
By the time Friday came around, the Paris Manuscript had still not arrived, but the entire group was wired nonetheless, wondering what the hell was in the _Voynich manuscript_ , and, more importantly, why The Professors had taken and kept it. Theories flew from slightly mystical - a botany book of magical plants - to the ludicrous - Will had drunkenly messaged the group suggesting it had a full layout of Area 51 and alien cultures.  
The worst part was that they had to wait in the student lounge after their last period for an hour. They gathered with coffees and more theories, and everyone jumped when Val and Allison's phones buzzed.  
It was an email from Professor Crowley that read simply, _"Meet me in room L219."_  
They exchanged looks.   
"Guess we're not the only ones interested," Eve said.  
"Maybe it's the students I heard about it from," Will said.  
"Probably. Who else?"  
There was general agreement at that, and they waited anxiously before getting to the room 10 minutes early.  
The students from before were _not_ there, but there was an older woman arguing with Professor Crowley - who was clutching an old looking book to his chest - Professor Fell calmly enjoying a glass of wine, and four children in a loud discussion about whales and aliens.  
"- of course I had to come see it! You drop the bomb on me that _you_ have the most famous book of shadows in the world today -"  
"Oh! Like how you had the best book on prophecy just sitting in your room?" Crowley scowled at her.  
The kids were the first to notice they'd come in, and got up to greet them. That quieted the argument as everyone turned to them.  
"I'm Adam," the boy in front announced. "That's Pepper, Wensleydale, and Brian."  
"Hi Adam!" Eve smiled at him. "I'm Eve, and this is Will, Sophia, Allison and Val. Are - are you here to look at the manuscript too?"  
He nodded. "We thought we'd need to know these things."  
Professor Crowley stalked over to the table where Professor Fell sat. "You are the _last_ group that should be looking at this."  
"Come on, Crowley! I didn't end the world, did I?"  
"Yeah," Pepper said, folding her arms. "I think you're just being ageist because we're so young."  
Crowley scowled at the girl, but it was half hearted. "This has been hidden for four hundred years, Pepper."  
"Which I hope should explain the no camera policy," Professor Fell said sternly as the group entered.  
They nodded.  
"And no using any of the spells," Professor Crowley said with a pointed glare at the woman, who rolled her eyes.  
"I'm Anathema Device," she told them with a smile. "Occultist."  
"So... it's a spellbook?" Allison asked, going over to the table. Everyone followed and they crowded around to stare at the old manuscript.  
It was Professor Fell who opened it with gentle hands. Inside was a weird script and a strange picture of plants.  
"This is just a yarrow," Professor Crowley said, pointing to the plant. "With a list of magical uses. You'd think they'd include how to grow it or something, but no."  
"What language is it?" Val asked.  
"It's a personal Hebrew," Anathema said. When everyone looked at her, she explained, "Witch families keep their own language to keep their spells and rituals secret. It's why witch hunters looked for women who could read; women weren't allowed to learn normal language, so any one who was reading had to be reading a familial script. You can tell it's based on hebrew by the shape of the letters."  
Professor Fell beamed. "Just so."  
"Can you read it, Aziraphale?" Adam asked.  
"Well, yes. But it did take a bit of deciphering."  
"Why were you deciphering, angel?" Professor Crowley frowned at his husband.  
"My dear, you had no other books in your flat. What was I supposed to do?"  
He hmmphed and flipped to the next page.  
This had weird stylized naked women and more of that strange script.  
"Is this a... spring ritual?" Anathema asked.  
"Yeah. Orgies and the like," Professor Crowley said. "You know how people are."  
"What's an orgy?" Brian asked.  
The look Professor Fell sent Professor Crowley made him wince.  
"You'll find out when you're older, child. And that is not the point of the book." Professor Fell moved on to a strange swirling picture.  
Will cocked his head to try to figure it out, but Professor Crowley flipped past it and the next few pages quickly. They all had those weird circular figures from what Will was able to gleam.  
"Crowley -" Anathema began.  
"We're skipping the live sacrifices," Professor Crowley said firmly. "And the dark magic."  
"That's most of the book, my dear," Professor Fell pointed out.  
"I promise I won't use any blood magic," Adam said.  
Will looked at the kid with a grin, but he looked completely serious. Even weirder, Professor Crowley was considering him completely seriously back. The group exchanged a Look.  
"Wait." Anathema stopped the flipping with a hand and studied the page it stopped on. This one had a few plants on it, that Professor Fell helpfully identified.  
"I recognize some of these." She tapped a few symbols in the margins of the paper. "Didn't we try out a modified version of this?"  
Adam looked up, excited. "You can modify them?"  
Professor Crowley looked incredibly put out and sent a glare at Anathema. [2]" _Yes_ , you can. But _you_ shouldn't... Let's just say most things accomplished through blood or death magic can be done without, but it takes a lot more skill and strength."  
"So... they're shortcuts, then?" Pepper asked. "Is that why dark witches are all Like That?"  
Crowley shrugged. "Yeah."  
"But... it doesn't work, surely?" Val asked. "I mean, who even came up with spells? Did people just try drawing random symbols and hope they'd do what they wanted?"  
The other group - the group Will was not a part of, exchanged their own Look.  
Which he took to mean these things did work.  
"I have no idea how they came up with it," Professor Fell said eventually, and continued flipping through the book.  
So, yeah, magic was real, so that was part of his world now. He forced down the slight freaking out feeling he had to focus again, this time on Professor Crowley explaining a warding spell that "needs the blood of an infant, for some Earth-forsaken reason."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 If they were aliens, technically they'd have to belong to one of the other conspiracies anyway, but as Will wasn't sure which one he preferred, he simply argued for aliens, without discussing details.[return to text]
> 
> 2 Unbeknownst to Will, Crowley was envisioning a future where Adam, getting really good at demon summoning, was able to drag him over to wherever he was to answer his weird questions at 3 in the morning, when any self respecting serpent was soundly asleep draped all over a certain angel.[return to text]
> 
> ***
> 
> Me, an absolute buffoon, right before doing extensive rewrites for several days: I have the story all written, so it'll be really easy to post!! :)


	5. Aziraphale

Aziraphale would argue, as they drew closer to the end of the semester, that they'd done better this year than the last. There were definitely some people asking questions, which was really the whole point of the thing, wasn't it? The group who'd asked to look at the manuscript had definitely had suspicions, though they'd been very polite to not voice them obviously. It _was_ nice to see humans who remembered their manners nowadays.[1]  
All in all, Aziraphale would argue -  
He paused in his perusal of the marketplace, feeling... something. It was the kind of feeling he associated with other celestial beings, that including the feeling of a displacement somewhere in the world, and oftentimes the faint scent of ozone.  
He quickly glanced around the area, but nothing stood out to him. No angels. No demons.  
At least, not so he could tell.  
Was he just being paranoid?  
Aziraphale couldn't be certain, but he put down the basil and garlic linguini he'd been considering trying out, and quickly headed towards the door. He surreptitiously studied everyone he passed, but no familiar faces looked out at him and no one quickly hid their face as he walked by.  
The feeling of a celestial being in the area didn't abate as he crossed the outdoor farmer's market, or as he walked down the street to their cottage.  
He felt just a tiny bit safer as he crossed the edges of their outer wards, and a breath of relief escaped him as he closed the cottage door behind him, feeling as safe as he could possibly hope to be anywhere on Earth - or off it, he supposed.  
"Crowley?" he called out.  
There was a lazy hiss from the living room and Aziraphale felt a soft fond smile crease his face despite the fear that had been hounding him as he entered the living room to find Crowley in his snake form, all curled up and dozing in the lit fireplace.  
Aziraphale wondered if he'd fanned their ember of hellfire into a blaze, as he sometimes did, just to enjoy the warmth. He always left another ember behind, of course, so they'd never be caught defenseless.  
Something in Aziraphale's entrance must have clued the demon into realizing something had Happened, because the snake unwound himself and slithered out of the fireplace, miracling himself clean as he went so no ash fell onto their nice hardwood floor.  
Aziraphale picked him up, and began to speak without prompting. "I thought I felt a celestial presence today at the market. I didn't see anyone, so it may have been nothing, but I think, just in case, we should try to be more careful."  
Crowley wound a coil around his arm and squeezed in support. He never belittled Aziraphale when he had a spike of paranoia, possibly because he did the same thing. No doubt in a few days with nothing else going on, they could take a breath and stand down the hyper-vigilance. But for now...

***

"I'm going to go bring the car around, Angel," Crowley announced, getting up from where they were waiting out the last of Crowley's office hours for the day. No one had shown up today, but that wasn't unusual. Some combination of students wanting to go home more than they wanted answers to questions, and the fact Crowley's classes were all in the morning and his office hours did not match in the slightest kept all but the most determined at bay. That was Crowley in a nutshell; he had Fallen for his curiosity and his propensity to question, and while he'd come to terms with it and had found pride in the way he was, he treated knowledge as both precious and dangerous. If you wanted to be curious, he thought, you had to earn it.  
Aziraphale frowned. "Maybe I should go with you." While Crowley did usually bring the car around himself, Aziraphale didn't necessarily want the demon going anywhere on his own just then.  
Crowley shrugged. "No need for us both to go."  
"But if something happens -"  
"Then better me than you," the demon said firmly.  
" _Crowley!_ " Aziraphale stood to continue the argument, but Crowley was already gone. Aziraphale scowled at the empty place, certain Crowley had used some of his time-stopping abilities to avoid the argument. [2]  
He sat back down with a sigh, and caught the flicker of movement in the hall.  
His heart stuttered, and it took him a second to decide whether to hunker down or go find the person. It was probably a student. Or a teacher. It wasn't like the campus was closed.  
Aziraphale took a deep breath and left the office, heading down the hallway. There wasn't any celestial presence, despite him pushing his senses to try to detect anyone. Not today, not here.  
Just around the corner was a student who jumped when Aziraphale became visible. The student glanced around nervously before looking at his feet.  
"Hello, Professor Fell."  
"Hello, Josh. Were you looking for someone?" He recognized him, from his Classic Literature class.  
"Uh, no, Professor Fell. I'm just - just studying... Going to the library."  
Aziraphale was sure that even if he hadn't spent six thousand years around Crowley, he still would have been able to tell the child was lying.  
"Of course." Aziraphale paused, wondering if he should question him. Find out if he'd seen Crowley disappear during their talk, if that was what was making him nervous.  
But then again, he didn't want to stand and preach. If the child wanted answers, he could ask. "Well, don't let me keep you." He nodded to him and continued on his way, heading towards the front of the building to where Crowley would be bringing the car, ready to let his lover know exactly what he thought of using time dilation as an argument. 

***

The other days, of course, Aziraphale didn't even have the opportunity to try to accompany his mate, as Crowley finished earlier than he did. Aziraphale did his best not to worry, but Professor Saxe asked him in concern if everything was alright on Wednesday, so he obviously wasn't doing particularly well in keeping up pretenses. Of course, if a particularly angry group from heaven or hell had decided to come after them, what Professor Saxe thought about the matter would be completely irrelevant.  
Aziraphale deflected, and left to join Crowley in the car, who looked incredibly grim.  
"I felt Something," Crowley told him as they sped away from the campus. "Someone's watching us."  
"Oh dear." Aziraphale wrung his hands.  
"Carry your sword, alright? Just to be safe."  
So he did. Part of him wanted to hole up in the cottage, if only so that Crowley stayed home with him. But he knew he couldn't, _Crowley_ couldn't stay inside for very long, so it was better to be out with Crowley than risk Crowley going out alone while he was safe in the cottage. And if he made an appearance in Crowley's classes (those that didn't overlap with his own, of course), or if Crowley lounged in the back in his, well...   
People may have noticed, but no one said anything.[3]  
On Friday, in his last class of the day, after a week's worth of stretched nerves, he felt a celestial presence enter his Arthurian Legends class - ten minutes late. As if they didn't even have the decency to show up on time and not interrupt class.  
Aziraphale felt himself freeze - mostly from fear but also partly from indignation - and Crowley's attention rivet on the female presenting white clad angel that had entered the classroom.  
She paused, looking from the two to the now silent class as if she hadn't expected everybody to be there. For a few seconds nobody moved, and Aziraphale didn't breathe.  
Then she made her way to an empty seat in the back of the class, no emotion showing on her face. Everyone watched her progress, but when she made no moves other than to settle in her seat, Aziraphale cleared his throat and tried to remember what they were learning about.  
Apparently he would be allowed to finish his lesson.  
Crowley didn't take his eyes off the angel for the entire lecture, and Aziraphale couldn't help glancing to her spot regularly.  
She didn't move, as if she was carved from stone, not until the students were packing away and heading out of the room. Some dawdled, clearly interested in what was to come. Aziraphale recognized the two that were packing at a glacial pace: Allison Bailey and Valery Moore.  
The angel came down to them and Crowley came to stand at his side. Aziraphale was very aware of his sword leaning against the back wall: a close summons away if the need arose.  
"I am Samandriel, [4]" the angel said without preamble when the room was empty. "I seek refuge."  
The clock ticked loudly to mark the seconds in the silent room.  
Once.  
Twice.  
Three times.  
Aziraphale forced himself to take a breath, aware of Crowley going preternaturally still beside him. "Refuge, my dear?"  
Samandriel nodded firmly.  
"Explain," Crowley drawled.  
Samandriel looked at him, and her mask slipped just the slightest bit, but Aziraphale could read desperation and fear in her eyes. If she was telling the truth, she'd come to them as a last hope.   
"There's a reason no one knew about your relationship until Michael looked herself," Samandrial said, getting herself back together. "I am - was - in charge of observation. I don't know why I didn't say anything; I wasn't trying to rebel, I swear. I don't want to Fall. I didn't want to be exiled. But I - I kept you quiet.... Michael and Gabriel have been going through the files. They'll know what I did... please," the last word was a whisper. "I'm not you. I can't stand against them."  
Aziraphale exchanged a look with Crowley.  
"Why don't we move this conversation to a more private location?" Aziraphale headed out the door without waiting for an answer, forcing Samandriel to follow. Crowley took up the rear, comfortable knowing he'd see any attacks on his angel, and Aziraphale would breathe easier knowing no angelic attack would be able to take Crowley by surprise.  
As he left, he noticed two backpacks still sitting on the desks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 It was Aziraphale's firm belief that it was the internet that was at fault for the slowly declining state of etiquette in the country - and elsewhere! It was just such an anonymous place, as far as he understood it, and the way Crowley spoke of it it also seemed so horribly informal with much bickering and yelling back and forth. No wonder people who spent too much time on their electronics forgot how to be properly behaved. [return to text]
> 
> 2 Normally Aziraphale would also be unduly impressed, because he hadn't actually met anyone else who could stop time, much less for as long as Crowley could hold it when absolutely necessary - or when desperately trying to disappear from an argument, which was the situation Aziraphale was most familiar with Crowley using it. Anytime the demon found himself particularly embarrassed, where a normal human might wish for the 'ground to swallow them whole', Crowley simply stopped time, turned into a snake, and hid, which gave the appearance of vanishing into thin air. [return to text]
> 
> 3 This was, in Aziraphale's opinion, another win for human etiquette.[return to text]
> 
> 4 AN: This is meant to be a completely made up angel name, and any similarity to a well known, or even poorly known documented angel is completely unintentional. [return to text]
> 
> ***
> 
> Hey everyone! Hope you enjoyed New Years. :)  
> Thank you everyone who left a comment or kudo! Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.


	6. Allison

"Say it again, exactly."  
Allison sighed. "She said, 'theres a reason no one knew about your relationship'. And that she was in charge of observation, and I guess that means she hid it for them. And she's going to get in major trouble for doing it."  
The group had gathered at the local bar the day after Allison and Val had stuck behind in class to hear what the hell was going on.  
It wasn't a secret that Crowley and Fell had been, well, jumpy this past week. Everyone had seen them glancing out the windows nervously during class, startling when someone entered their offices. And then they'd started showing up in each other's classes, as if worried something would happen while they weren't around.  
And then there was the sword that showed up in Professor Fell's classroom.  
Of course, no one had said anything, not to their professors anyway, though Will had told them another student swore up and down they'd seen Professor Crowley disappear in the middle of an argument with Professor Fell. Just straight up disappeared.  
Will's friend also said he'd seen them outside the campus the night before with a woman in a large dress and glasses. The group had agreed it must be Anathema Device, occultist, and the three of them were doing some kind of magic. [1]  
"So... that's some kind of Romeo and Juliet shit," Will said. "Damn."  
"Warring families, do you think?" Eve asked. [2]  
"Probably."  
"It's cute," Val said with a soft smile. "They went against everyone they knew to be with each other. They must love each other a lot."  
Allison managed a weak smile. It certainly took a lot of strength or love to have to stand up to everyone you knew. She hadn't actually planned to ever do anything like that herself; she didn't have that kind of strength. She wouldn't be able to function without her family, without everyone who she knew and who had cared for her. How could she give that up? How had they?  
"They're obviously still scared," Sophia pointed out, eyes on the napkin she was playing with. "Maybe they shouldn't have done it. Now they're dragging other people into their own problems."  
"Sophia!" Val looked scandalized.  
Sophia shrugged and tapped the folded up napkin fan against the table. "I'm just saying. I don't think it's been just this week either. They're just _always_ on alert, and you don't notice because it's how you've always known them. But they always situate themselves so they have their backs to a wall and they can see the windows, and so that they have a path an exit if necessary. I can't imagine living like that."  
"Not even for _looove_?" Will asked.  
"I've definitely never felt anything worth that kind of thing."  
"Yeah, but everyone's different. Some of us _do_ actually fall in love, you know," Val said.  
"It's just a chemical high."  
"It's a compatibility of the soul!"

***

By Monday, The Professors had moved back from "actively not letting each other out of their sight" to "on incredibly high alert". This was one step above their usual "high alert", which Allison had decided after some consideration Sophia was right about.  
It made the whole of their love story that much sadder, but people would do these things for love, she supposed.  
Val had skipped out on Monday, probably because she'd stayed up studying the night before, [3] so Allison was in the class on her own, which made going up to Professor Fell to ask about the refuge seeker that much easier.  
Besides, Professor Fell didn't seemed surprised in the slightest when she came up to him after class. He just smiled that gentle, kind smile of his. "Hello, Allison. Did you want something?"  
"I - I just wanted, well, you know on Friday that woman... is she alright?"  
Professor Fell nodded. "Yes. Don't worry about that, dear child, she will be quite alright."  
"Was..." She paused, not quite sure how to word what she wanted to say. What she should be asking was why they were in danger, or what they were in danger from. Instead, what she really wanted to hear was that Sophia was wrong. She wanted to hear him tell her that it was worth everything to find love. But she couldn't quite get it out. What if he said no? What if he said yes?  
"Allison?"  
She shook her head. "I'm just glad she's alright," she managed, before fleeing.

***

Allison tried to calm her breathing as she went up to the door. She had avoided the Professors all week, but something had drawn her to the office. Ostensibly, she was coming to talk to Professor Crowley because she had no idea how to organize all the information he'd dumped on them throughout the semester. But if that was the only reason she wanted to talk to him, why did her heart beat so quickly? It wasn't as if the immortal punished people who came to office hours.  
She steeled herself and knocked on the door, receiving a lazy "Come in" in response.   
Allison entered the room, and Crowley smiled a little at seeing her.  
That was suspicious.  
She smiled back, though, politely.  
"Hello, Professor Crowley. I - I was just studying and I was wondering if I could ask you something?" She held up the notebook like a shield.  
"Of course." Professoe Crowley gestured towards the seat, sprawling on his chair in a way that made it hard to even think the word 'sitting' had anything in common with it. He had his shades on as always, and Allison was willing to bet his eyes were inhuman.  
She took a breath and sat in the chair, which was plush and comfortable. The rest of the office was stark and minimalist, though there were several potted plants present. They looked tense, or maybe she was just imagining it because she'd heard he yelled and threatened them to behave.   
"It's just you haven't released a study guide and I was wondering what will be on the test." She got the sentence out in a rush.  
"I haven't? Hmm." Crowley rummaged through his desk before producing a piece of paper. "There you go."  
Allison stared at it. "Wha - why not just hand it out?"  
"It's not hard to come to office hours, but you'd be surprised how few people do it. You'd be surprised how many things you can learn if you put in the smallest bit of effort."  
Allison stared at the paper he was holding out to her, then looked to him. His smile seemed to suggest he was talking about something other than schoolwork. Did he know they knew he wasn't human? Was he offering to tell her, if she just asked? If she just dared reach for the truth?  
Allison took the paper, and swallowed, looking at it. It was perfectly neatly typed up with all the specific events that she should know. She thought of how Professor Fell had put his name just out of reach in their textbooks. So obvious if you took the time to search them, if you cared to look.  
She looked back up at him to find him watching her intently through his sunglasses, leaning forward.  
Would he take them off if she asked?  
"Professor Crowley?"  
"Yesss?"  
"Was it so awful that you fell in love with Professor Fell?"  
Professor Crowley took a moment.  
Allison blushed. She hadn't been intending to ask that, but somehow, she wanted the answer more than the mystery of what he was. "Was it because he's a man?" she asked softly.  
Sympathy filled his face and Crowley changed some of the minutae of how he was sitting, and all of the sudden he wasn't tempting her towards some forbidden knowledge, but offering support.  
"My people," Crowley said. Not his family. His people. "don't care that Aziraphale is a man. I think the bigger problem was that I dared to love at all."  
She swallowed. "I'm sorry."  
He shrugged. "I know what they are," he said simply.  
"Did they try to hurt you?"  
Professor Crowley froze for a split second. "Yes. But we got away. Allison, is this about your friend Valery?"  
Allison blushed and looked down.  
"My people didn't approve of love because it makes you daring. It makes you step out of line."  
She nodded slowly. Sounded almost... cultish. "And Professor Fell's... people... they felt the same?"  
Crowley nodded, thoughtful. "Love makes you want. It makes you reckless and it makes you brave. It makes you a little bit selfish."  
They sat in silence for a few seconds, then Allison admitted softly, "I wished I would never fall in love. I knew it'd be... my parents would hate me. Will hate me. It would have been so much easier if it never happened. Sometimes I think... maybe I can just ignore it and everything will be alright again. No one will hate me if I die a spinster."  
"Yeah.... Look at me, Allison."  
She looked up, meeting those dark lenses with a soft frown.  
Crowley reached up and pulled them off and she felt her heart freeze.  
"I nearly died to love Aziraphale. I would never give it up, no matter what may come."  
She nodded mutely.  
He put his glasses back on.  
"Now go share your study guide with your friend."  
She nodded and stood jerkily, still staring. Then she turned and hurried out of the office.

***

Allison found herself in front of Val's room without really remembering how she got there. She still held the study guide in her hand, and she could see those slitted eyes as if she was still looking straight at him.  
She paused in front of the door. She liked Val. But was it a liking that was worth dying for?  
 _It makes you daring_  
Well, it certainly did that. She didn't think she'd ever more wanted to step out of line than when she was with Val. Even if she could never bring her home. Sometimes it felt like even if she herself could never go home. Was she really happy to be a bitter old woman one day, looking back and wondering if there wasn't more she was missing out on?  
Allison knocked on the door.  
"Hey!" Val beamed and stepped back to let her in and Allison managed to thrum up a smile in return.  
Val's smile disappeared as she closed the door.  
"Is everything alright?"  
Allison held up the study guide to have something physical and Not Important to talk about. "Professor Crowley gave me a study guide." The ' _oh, and he has snake eyes_ didn't quite get out.  
"What? Nice!" Val took it and looked it over. "I didn't think he could _be_ this organized."  
Allison smiled at that. "He likes to make us work for the knowledge, I think." The eyes hadn't been a freebie. He'd shown them to make sure she fucking paid attention. Probably Professor Fell had told him about her failure to function earlier.  
"Well that's not surprising to me at all." Val looked her over. "Is there something else that happened?"  
"Yeah, kind of. I mean, yes, definitely something else. It's..." Allison looked around and lowered her voice. "He took off his glasses, while we were talking."  
Val gasped and stared at her. "What? What does he look like?"  
"He has yellow-orange snake eyes. Like a viper."  
"Oh my god! No way!"  
"Yup." Allison grinned a little at Val's shocked expression. "I guess that's why all the snake... stuff. He's some kind of... snake person."  
"Like a shifter, maybe! Or a skin walker, though those are Native American and he and Professor Fell are just _so_ British." Val looked a little overwhelmed with the possibilities, and Allison watched her continue to ramble.  
 _I would never give it up, no matter what may come_  
Allison smiled when Val paused to breathe.  
"Val? Do you want to go out with me?"  
Val blushed and her smile turned shy. "Sure." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 They weren't clear on what exactly they were doing, as nothing else was glimpsed. Besides, the sum total of their magical knowledge was that out of everyone, those three would _definitely not_ be using the blood of an infant. And that was enough for them. [return to text]
> 
> 2 Eve had decided they were probably witches. Whether that gave them time traveling abilities or immortality was still a subject under discussion. Will held out for his alien theory. [return to text]
> 
> 3 This seemed to Allison to be counterproductive, but who was she to judge? It wasn't like her grades were that great. Besides, skipping one of Professor Fell's classes after their research binge shouldn't be too bad. [return to text]
> 
> ****
> 
> So I actually finished editing this chapter, holy shit. Hope it was worth the wait, it's cute and fluffy.


	7. Sophia

The winter break came and went, and Sophia released a happy sigh on returning to her dorm room. She was ready for classes to begin, for the manic pace of class and test and homework and working on her thesis. She'd planned it out the previous semester, and now came the research and the writing, but she wasn't worried about it in the least; Professor Crowley was her advisor, and he didn't seem averse to giving out knowledge.  
She grinned as she set her bags away.  
That was something else she was ready to get back to. She'd missed it a lot over the break, all of the things she couldn't talk to her family. They'd just look at her like she'd gone mad, most likely. They simply would never _understand_ , and while it wasn't totally new, and though it sucked in a lot of ways, it made the return that much sweeter.   
To her _friends_.  
Over the break, Val had made the trip to Soho to ask around, and she'd heard plenty of stories about 'The nice old man who never sold a book' - who never seemed to age - and his red headed boyfriend. Coupled with Professor Crowley's snake eyes and possible disappearing abilities, well. The only real question was _what_ not _whether_. The idea of him being a witch seemed unlikely. Maybe Professor Fell was a witch, but witches didn't suddenly get snake eyes. Sophia had been incredibly pleased to call 'immortals' while Will had gone 'obviously aliens'.  
Sophia wasn't inclined towards aliens. For one thing, witches and magic and aliens never seemed to mix. When she'd brought that up, Will had pouted, but in the end, they'd all done a lot of research on snake related mythical creatures, from the Nü Wa in China to the Egyptian god of chaos, but they weren't sure anything fit. He definitely wasn't half snake, for starters.   
Allison said she had the impression they could just ask. After all, he'd shown her his eyes. But no one actually wanted to go see him and ask "so what kind of creature, exactly, are you?"  
It just seemed, well, kind of rude.  
For this semester she was TAing another of Professor Crowley's classes, this one about WWII. She also had her thesis class with him, and another two classes in other historical areas, with other teachers. Everyone in the group had taken at least one class with either Professor Crowley or Fell, even if it took up an elective.  
She grinned, finished packing her stuff away, and headed out to meet at Val's dorm with the rest of the group.  
She rubbed her eyes as she passed one of the windows. Ever since she'd reached campus, her eyes had been acting up. Something about the angle of the light, probably, but the air seemed to shimmer.  
Val had been the only one to stay at the university, though part of that was because Eve and Will lived with their parents close enough to make the drive every day.  
She knocked before entering to find Val and Allison lounging on the bed. Allison had cut her hair short over the break, and she was holding her girlfriend's hand.  
"Hey!" Val beckoned her onto the bed, so she came to join the pair, sitting on the edge where they wouldn't accidentally run into her.  
"How was break?" Sophia asked, as if they hadn't kept in touch. It was the appropriate introductory question after being apart.  
"Great," Val said. "Guess what Ally's doing."  
Sophia raised an eyebrow at the girl, who held up a pentagram necklace.  
"I've decided to become a witch. I mean, apparently I can, so why not, right?"  
Sophia could only shrug. "Just don't start using the blood of newborns for your wards."  
They laughed.  
"I'd never. I've been doing a lot of reading into it, and I think I'll ask Professor Fell for some books on witchcraft and the occult." Allison beamed. They didn't have his class this quarter, but they knew him, so that was enough. "Val said she'll learn with me. Do you want to?"  
Sophia shrugged again. "I think I'm good with the witchcraft. Unless you learn super easy spells for fortune, definitely let me know about those."  
"I think I can promise that."  
"Hey! Group's nearly all here?" Will leaned into the room.  
"Yup." Val popped the 'p', a habit she'd picked up from Professor Crowley. "Come join the bed huddle."  
"Oh wow, one guy, so many girls, one bed."  
A pillow hit him in the face and he laughed as he joined, leaning against the wall. "Glad to be back?"  
"Yes," Sophia piped up. "Like you wouldn't believe. I plan to spend this entire quarter picking Professor Crowley's brain for lost knowledge."  
"And we'll be learning about the occult," Allison volunteered. "Want to join?"  
"Eh, yeah, sure, why not?" Will shrugged. "No demon summoning and I'm good."  
"Yeah, nothing from the Voynich Manuscript," Val promised.  
"Then count me in." Will grinned. "What's a male witch called anyway?"  
"Still a witch, sorry. But you can go by occultist if it's too feminine for you," Allison offered.  
"Cool. I'm gonna be an occultist then."  
That was when Eve entered, though she turned down the offer to join the witchery as she joined them on the bed.   
Sophia looked around at her group and smiled. She felt like she was safe and home again.

***

The next semester started out with the usual chaos, and Sophia felt herself settle happily. She blocked out office hours that were easier for the students to get to than Professor Crowley's, though she knew that for some of the material she would be woefully unable to help. That was just the way she wanted it, because that meant she'd be learning material that no one would be able to research.  
On the second day, though, she realized that Professor Crowley seemed... jumpy. She brought it up with the group, who agreed and said Professor Fell was the same. Almost like when the woman showed up asking for refuge, except they hadn't yet moved to sitting in each other's classes, and Professor Fell's sword had yet to appear.  
Sophia hoped they didn't get there, but the tension in their professors translated into a tension in the group, as they peered about the grounds, wondering if they'd be able to see or feel the danger. Sophia was starting to worry there was something really wrong with her eyes, because the air didn't stop shimmering. She'd mentioned it once, but no one else saw anything.  
That first weekend the new trio of witches lit some candles and cast a protection spell that they all just had to hope worked out, because no one had made the time to go talk to Professor Fell about witchcraft just yet.  
Val promised they'd do another one once they were more sure of what they were doing.  
The next Wednesday Sophia entered Professor Crowley's office to find him more nervous than usual, as evidenced by his hissed threats at the potted plant on the windowsill.  
Sophia cleared her throat and he looked up at her, opaque glasses hiding the serpentine gaze she _knew_ was there.  
"Oh good," Professor Crowley said. "Let's talk about this while we walk."  
Sophia nodded as Professor Crowley left the office and she followed. "So, um, as we talked about, I was going to write my thesis about the founding of Babylon. I have my outline and I was hoping you could go over it with me to make sure I have all the dates and events in the right order."   
"Mm hmm, that sounds fine." It was obvious the professor was distracted.  
Sophia raised an eyebrow as they entered the stairwell, but said nothing as they climbed to the roof except, "If you had any resources or contacts, I'd like to interview people for it. I have the time, so we can set up Skype calls with people, and maybe even with a translator."  
Crowley nodded. "Good idea."  
"I was thinking," she continued, braving on and praying this wouldn't lose her the topic. "That maybe I could also, you know, interview you about it."  
"Yeah." Crowley pushed open the door to the roof, and led them onto it.   
There was no way he was listening.  
"And then maybe I could commune with the dead, for a fuller experience. I know someone who can seance. Actually, Allison, Val and Will are getting into witchcraft, so maybe they can just do it for me. I was hoping you'd let me know how to cite seances with the dead in a scholarly paper."  
"Uh huh." Crowley peered over the edge, then frowned and turned to her. "Wait, what?"  
She sighed. "How much of the conversation did you hear?"  
Crowley gestured vaguely. "Babylon, outline, interviews?"  
Sophia sighed. "What's up?" She went over to the edge and looked over. "What are we looking for?"  
"Who says we're looking for anything?"  
Sophia gave him a Look, and then headed along the edge of the roof. This time, it was Crowley who followed.  
"I'm just being paranoid," Professor Crowley hissed. "There's probably no one there."  
"No harm in checking." Sophia shrugged. "I'm not going to be late for anything."  
Crowley frowned but they walked together for a while, the professor scanning the faces of everyone below while she kept an eye out for anything weird.  
She rubbed her eyes as they finished the first quarter of their walk. Being surrounded by sky as she was, the sparkling was starting to wear on her eyes. "Is it just me or is the sky being weird?" She sent him a discreet glance, hoping maybe the immortal would know what was going on.   
"Hmm?"  
"I don't know, it's sparkling almost." She sighed. "Maybe there's water vapor or something."  
"Definitely pos- get down." Crowley flung himself behind the low wall on the edge of the roof.   
Sophia joined him, peering over the edge. "Where?"  
Crowley peeked at the people below. "11 o'clock. Blond hair. Brown coat."  
Sophia found the person, shuffling along the edge of campus, looking like some homeless bum. People were giving him looks, and he obviously didn't fit on the campus.   
"I see him," she murmured. "No chance he's looking for refuge?"  
Crowley barked a laugh as he got his phone out. "Not a chance." He put the phone to his ear and waited until it was picked up.  
"Aziraphale? Stay inside. Yeah, Hastur's lurk- I'm not confronting him! I'm being good - no, angel. No, just grade papers or something."  
"Want me to let you know when he's gone?" Sophia asked.  
Crowley sent her a grateful look. "My thesis student is with me, we're just waiting him out... yeah. _Yes_. Alright. I'll come get you when he leaves. See you soon, angel." He clicked the phone off with a sigh.   
Sophia had half tuned out the conversation, staring at the man - Hastur. The rest of the world began to grey, a white noise filling her ears.   
"What's wrong with his _face_?"  
"Oh ho!"  
She looked back at Crowley and the world seemed to restart. "What?"  
"Look at him again."  
Sophia did, but she couldn't see the holes in his skin this time. She frowned. Even if she could have, he was too far away for her to have seen it in such detail, where she'd seen the individual cracks in his face. "What..."  
"You've developed the Sight. Good for you." He paused. "You've probably been seeing the wards around the school, the sparkling, I mean."  
"Did... is that what you did last quarter after that woman came for refuge?"  
He nodded.  
She frowned again, then looked at him. "Why don't you look all weird then?"  
He grinned and slid off the glasses. "Don't I?"  
She had nothing to say in response to his golden serpentine gaze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: as of 1/21. Made a mistake - Val and Allison are in Crowley's class only this semester, sorry!


	8. Eve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who are keeping up 1) wahoo, and 2) I made a mistake last chapter. Allison and Val are in Crowley's class, not Fell's. Sorry!

Eve frowned when a woman entered Professor Fell's class and made her way to the front, holding a small stack of papers. She had a round set of glasses and a fitting if slightly old fashioned looking dress.  
This was Anathema Device, occultist.  
Where was Professor Fell?  
She exchanged a glance with Will, who looked just as lost and confused.  
"Hello, everyone," Ms. Device said clearly. "I'm filling in for Professor Fell today. My name is Anathema Device. So, I have some notes about what we're covering, so let's get started."  
The class was significantly more organized than usual, but that didn't lower the hair on the back of Eve's neck. Not having Professor Fell just felt wrong, especially with how nervous he'd been recently.  
She pulled out her phone.

 **~eevee~:** _fell isn't here_

 **Allycat:** _crowley wasn't in class either_

 **Allycat:** _think something happened?_

 **Sophia:** _It's hastur_

 **~eevee~:** _?????_

 **Silverback:** _????????_

 **EternallyTired:** _well thhats an easier explanation than usual. its hastur! well done, everyone go home_

 **Sophia:** _yesterday when i went to meet him about my thesis, we walked on the roof and when he spotted this gross loiking guy he freaked out and called fell and we sat there and i told him when the guy left. Ill tell you all about it after class._

Eve and Will exchanged a look. Something was going on.  
Again.  
Will leaned over and whispered, "I'm gonna ask Anathema about occult stuff once class is over. I'll catch up right afterwards."

***

Eve tapped the table after hearing the story from Sophia, who was wearing a pair of sunglasses indoors. Everyone was quiet and contemplative, turning it over.  
"So that must be _his_ people," Allison said eventually. "Do you think they're threatening him?"  
"Maybe. Probably," Sophia agreed, looking out the window. "So maybe they just stayed home."  
"And maybe this guy will keep bothering them until they decide to leave," Eve pointed out. "You know they're paranoid. Probably for good reason."  
Val nodded. "The girl seeking refuge looked terrified. Ok, not looked. She was actually kind of unemotional, but you could tell she was hiding it."  
"It was in her voice," Allison agreed.  
"They can't leave," Sophia said softly. "I don't want them to leave."  
"I doubt _we_ could do anything," Will pointed out. He held a copy of _New Aquarian_ in his backpack after talking to Anathema. "They'll either -"  
"There he is again," Sophia hissed. "See? He's lurking just past the wards."  
They all turned to look.  
"The bum?" Will asked.  
Sophia nodded, staring at the man intently. "That's him. The parasite. The _скатина_." Hearing Sophia curse was always eerie because her voice was so flat when she did it.  
Eve glared at the bum threatening their... their school. Their experience. Their professors that they all liked. "Let's go talk to him."  
She stood and everyone turned to stare at her, except Sophia who was now staring down at the table intently.  
"Come on. There's five of us. What's he gonna do, fry us to a crisp in public?" She headed out of the library, with Val and Allison catching up to her first, grinning widely. Sophia trailed just a step behind the other four, exuding nerves, but she came with.  
Eve marched straight up to the... Hastur. "Hello," she painted on a fake smile. "Can I help you find something?"  
The man stared at her. "Go away."  
"No." She folded her arms. "What are you doing here?"  
"You don't look like a student," Allison added.  
Hastur glared at them. "None of your business if you know what's good for you."  
Eve took a step closer, glancing at Sophia for reassurance she stayed safely behind the wards. "I disagree, Hastur," she hissed. His eyes went wide, and the irises were black. He smelled horrible, but she ignored it. "I think you need to leave right now."  
"How dare -" The step forward was cut off as he hit something invisible and hissed.  
"Something in your way?" Val asked with a sickly sweet smile.  
"You think you're so safe, here, don't you? Just keep your eyes open, _girls_. I'll be there when you least expect it."  
Eve watched him turn away from them.  
"We're going to die," Sophia whispered.  
"I'm a _man_!" Will shouted at the retreating back, to hear laughter in response. Then, between one blink and the next, Hastur disappeared.  
Ok, so maybe it hadn't been the best thought out idea. But she'd had to do something, right?  
"Can I stay in someone's dorm?" Will asked. "I don't know how I feel about venturing off campus."

***

"Let's skip."  
Eve grunted in response from under the mountain of blankets.  
"Maybe we should walk the perimeter of campus, make sure Hastur's not here again," Val suggested. "I don't feel like class either. Not with something like this going on."  
"There was definitely something off about that man," Allison agreed from her spot on Val's chest. "Even if he wasn't freaking out the professors, I wouldn't want him around."  
"He's not a man," Sophia hissed. The whole group had spent the night in Val's dorm, no one wanting to make a trek out of the wards. "Did no one else see the way his skin was all cracked and broken in? And his eyes were all black."  
There were a few seconds of silence.  
"Cracked?" Eve peered out from under the blankets.  
Sophia frowned and snapped the bracelet on her wrist. "I guess it's a Sight thing..."  
"What did you see?" Will asked curiously.  
She sighed. "More than I want."  
"I still think we should guard our border," Val said. "I don't want him here. Whatever he is, he's not like our immortals. He's dangerous."  
Allison nodded. "Agreed."  
They jumped when Sophia's phone buzzed and she checked it quickly.  
She froze.  
Everyone else tried to lean in, careful not to make her uncomfortable by touching her.  
"Crowley wants to see us," she announced. "Right now."  
They dressed quickly and quietly, Will searching through all the blankets for his binder and finding it eventually under the bed, Allison wearing a combination of her and Val's clothing, and Sophia carefully redressing in exactly what she'd worn the previous day that she'd carefully set aside. Eve hadn't bothered undressing except for throwing her bra on the farside of the room, and wasn't in the mood to be restricted by it that day.  
It wasn't long before they were all ready and traipsing through the hall. They paused in front of Crowley's office, which had all the blinds drawn and the door closed. Eve could hear Professors Crowley and Fell bickering, though, so they were here. Sophia knocked and let them in.  
" - going to pretend the radiator incident never happened, hmm?" Professor Fell sent a look at his husband, who managed to only spit out unintelligible sounds until he caught sight of them.  
"You! In, right now."  
" _Crowley_ ," Professor Fell admonished.  
They all silently filed in and sat in the chairs that had been arranged for them. Will pushed the door closed, being the last to enter, and sure this whole affair was to be kept as quiet as possible, if for no other reason than that Professor Crowley wasn't wearing his sunglasses.  
Eve stared at the serpentine eyes she'd been told were behind the dark lenses. Somehow it made sense on him, once you got past the shock. His whole demeaner was so snake-like that everything seemed to fit.  
"Do you five want to tell me whossse brilliant idea it wasss," Crowley hissed at them. "To go antagonize the Duke of _Hell_?"  
They all exchanged glances, then looked at the floor.  
" _Out with it!_ "  
They cringed.  
"We - we just... he was being threatening," Eve said, feeling the need to save her friends from the interrogation when it had been her idea. "To you guys..."  
"We can take of ourselves just fine, my dear," Professor Fell said gently, and they all looked at him hopefully.  
"But we didn't want him freaking you out and scaring you away!" Sophia burst out.  
"That issss _not_ your concccccern!" Crowley snapped. "You are messsssssing with thingssss that are far _far_ above your headsss!"  
They flinched.  
"Darling, you're being contradictory," Professor Fell said with a fond look at his husband.  
Crowley hissed at him but turned away, running his hands through his hair.  
Professor Fell turned back to the kids. "However, Crowley is right in some respects. You had no idea who you were going up against. What was your plan?"  
They all exchanged a look.  
"We were behind the wards," Eve managed.  
"And what, you'll be sssstaying there your whole damn _life?_ " Crowley turned back to them, though he seemed a little more in control of himself. But only slightly.  
"N-no." Will swallowed. "We did stay here last night, though."  
"Wise decision." Professor Fell nodded. "Did you have any way to protect yourself other than the ward?"  
They exchanged looks.  
"Not really," Eve whispered.  
"You could have been _killed!_ " Professor Crowley lost his cool again. "Thisss isss the _ssstupidesst_ thing I've ever fucking _heard_ of! You jusssst -"  
"Crowley."  
Professor Crowley stalked to the back of the office and hissed at a plant.  
The plant trembled.  
"Now, I am not going to say you should stay 'in your lane', as the kids say nowadays, or not question." This was accompanied with a look at Crowley that went unnoticed. "But I must insist you protect yourself properly." Professor Fell smiled kindly at them, and snapped his fingers.  
They gasped as five little spray bottles appeared on the desk.  
They exchanged wide eyed looks.  
"Now, please, each of you take one. They're set on closed."  
"What is it?" Allison turned the small bottle in her hands.  
"Holy water," Professor Fell said. "If you run into anyone like Hastur, spray and run."  
"What'll it do?" Val asked.  
"Burnssss like acid, but ten time timesss worssse." Crowley accompanied this with an angry slouch against the wall. "Do _not_ ssssstay and fight. Run like hell, underssstand?"  
They all nodded seriously.  
"And," Crowley added. "if you get approached by sssssome suited prickssss with ssssticks up their assssses, _just_ run."  
Eve bit her lip.  
"What would work against the pricks?" Val asked curiously.  
Crowley looked like he wanted to yell again, but he just grit out, "hellfire. But that'sss not ssssomething you can carry with you. Got it?"  
They nodded again, though Will, Allison and Val exchanged looks.  
"Now I'm sure you five have classes to get to," Professor Fell said, clapping his hands together.  
"Um, Professor?" Sophia asked carefully, staring at the bottle.  
"Yes, dear?"  
"Hastur isn't going to go after you, is he? I mean... you're not gonna leave, are you?"  
"No." Professor Fell smiled kindly. "We won't be leaving. We actually ran into Hastur yesterday evening and had a lovely conversation."  
"Perfectly lovely," Crowley agreed, with a much less kind smile, with - were his teeth a little pointed?  
Eve swallowed.


	9. Will

"We're learning how to summon hellfire, right?" Will looked over at his two witch friends once they got together for their witch meetings.  
There were probably better ways to say that.  
"Of course!" Allisom grinned. "We have to."  
"Otherwise we'd be defenseless against the pricks." Val pulled several old looking books out of her bag. "But first we need to do research."  
Will took one and thumbed through it. "Where'd you get these?"  
"Internet. But I asked Professor Fell about it first."  
"Do you think we'll find hellfire in a book Professor Fell recommended?" Will asked seriously.  
Val shrugged helplessly. "I got these before it came up. But I mean, it's still a start. It's not like we've managed to do anything else."  
Allison sighed. "Being a witch is like doing homework for an extra class," she complained, but she obligingly took a book. "Do we start with summoning hellfire, or do we want to try out simpler spells first?"  
Will winced. "As much as I'd like the protection, simpler spells is probably the better idea. I don't want my first magic to be burning down the entire campus."  
They shared a sigh and settled to do serious reading. Allison provided crisps, while Will made a run for capri sun after an hour. Val gave everyone weed, which made the entire experience a lot easier to get through.  
"We're like a coven!" Allison burst out. "A proper coven of witches!"  
Val giggled. "Don't covens have orgies or something?"  
"You don't _have_ to. Do you?" She looked to Will.  
Will frowned and tried to have a non-weed thought. A normal thought. The kind of thing that didn't feel like it was sliding through cupped hands like heavy smoke, but something that was sharp. Clear.  
"Will?"  
Will's eyes opened wide, and then he burst into giggles. "I'm sorry!" he managed between fits of laughter. "I was trying so hard to think I forgot the question!"  
The girls joined him in laughing, the three of them rolling on the floor until their sides hurt.  
"You guys. Guys," Allison gasped. "We need to focus!"  
"Right." Val stretched out, sinuous as a cat. "Focus. Focus on what?"  
Will did his best to stifle his giggles, though the girls still let one loose occasionally.  
"Umm." Allison looked around as if she could catch the threads of her thoughts somewhere in the pages on the floor. "Magic! We have to focus on magic!"  
"I'm always focused on magic," Will retorted. "It's become a defining page of my life." Because there weren't any threads on the floor. Just books.  
"Let's just choose a spell and do it." Val flipped through her book. "Like... here. For... for a healthy liver."  
Will burst into giggles again, which set off Allison. Val smiled too, though she seemed content to just enjoy their mirth.  
Will grabbed a book at random and opened it. "This! Spell for pure water!"  
"You guys, you guys," Allison wriggled through the pages like a snake. She ended up on Val's stomach. "Professor Fell gave us the most harmless books."  
"Of course he did. That's who Professor Fell _is_." Val ran her fingers through Allison's hair and Allison tried to purr, which made Val chuckle, which vibrated Allison's head and made Will giggle again.  
"I think we had too much weed," Allison bemoaned. "We can't do a spell like this."  
"Sure we can!" Will rolled onto his stomach. "Ok, wait, I'm getting this water spell."  
"Mmm. Ok," Val's voice sounded a little sleepy.  
Will forced himself up, though it felt like he was pushing through molasses. He did his best to focus on being able to walk and was slightly startled when he made it to the sink. Methodically he got a glass, holding it tightly so it wouldn't fall from weed-slackened fingers, then filled it with both water and salt.  
Safe. Easy. Harmless.  
He brought it back, then wrinkled his nose at the other two. "Really?"  
Allison pulled back from her and Val's kiss, smiling dopily. "Oh! Water! To drink?"  
"No!" He cradled the glass closer to himself. "For the spell." He gestured to the book and Val wiggled over to look at it.  
"Oil! And sage and... and cedar! Do we have cedar?"  
"There's some Lebanon Cedar[1] on campus," Allison said, eyebrows furrowed as she tried to focus on the moment.  
Will stared at her.  
"What?" She shifted. "Professor Crowley likes plants, ok? He pointed it out once."  
"Right... well, can you get some?"  
Allison nodded and slowly forced herself to her feet and headed out.  
Val got up and wandered to the shared kitchen area.  
Will stared at the water.  
He sipped it.  
Disgusting.  
But now he had a baseline, and they could see if it worked even a little bit.  
He stretched out and closed his eyes, letting time stretch infinitely out before him, every second an age in its passing, and yet flying by like a shooting star. He didn't try to catch any moment, just let it pass by until Val returned with a bottle of vegetable oil and some ground sage. [2]  
Will pushed himself to sit and check the book. "So we just mix everything, rub it on the cup and repeat the Latin."  
Val nodded. "Yuuuup." She popped the 'p'. "As soon as Ally comes back we can sit and do it."  
Will nodded. "Hopefully we won't accidentally summon a demon if we get it wrong."  
Val giggled. "If I remember right, we need to do some unspeakable things for that to happen. Don't think they'll come on accident."  
"Maybe if we just asked nicely. Do you call them by name, or does the closest one come over?"  
"Huh." Val tipped her head back, considering. "I don't really know. Bet the Voynich Manuscript explains it though."  
"Don't think I want those kinds of explanations." He shuddered.  
Val nodded and they sat quietly for a few minutes before Allison wandered in, flowers in her hair and a sprig from a tree.  
"Good. Get the needles off and we'll mix it all together."  
They all concentrated through the high, managing to get everything done, then they sat in a circle, exchanging excited looks.  
Allison dipped her fingers in the oil and marked the cup.  
_"Fácias purificátis_  
_Dulce et tutum."_  
They repeated the two lines five times. They weren't totally in tune, but each of them said it five times. That was what mattered, right? [3]  
When Val trailed off finally, they exchanged more looks.  
Will took the glass and chugged it, then slammed it down on the floor.  
"It's salty."

***

"I just think being forced to write takes all the fun out of it."  
Eve snorted. "You know you're getting a _journalism_ degree, right?"  
Will rolled his eyes, scanning the page of his book to search for the quote he knew was there somewhere. "That'll be different. I'll get paid for that."  
Eve shook her head. "I think it'll be very much the same."  
"Articles and essays are really different. Who knows? Maybe I'll land Buzzfeed and just churn out garbage."  
"Ah yes. The dumpster of journalism. You'd actually do that?"  
"If they pay well, absolutely. Come on, Eve. You gotta do what you gotta do."  
She shook her head, and they typed in silence for a few moments before Will said, as casually as possible, "I'm thinking of reaching out to Anathema Device."  
Eve looked up from her laptop. "About the magic stuff?"  
He nodded. "Figure out what we're doing wrong. We wanted to learn to summon hellfire, but we can't manage _any_ basic spell."  
"She does seem like the person to go to for that kind of stuff," Eve agreed. "Do you have her number?"  
"She gave me her email after we talked." He gave her a small smile before turning back to his work. "I just don't want to bother her."  
Eve shrugged. "It's an email. It's not like you're barging into her house. Do it."  
"I will," he said, firmer.  
"So," Eve began after another few moments of silent work. "Are we ever going to ask Professors Fell and Crowley about all this? You know, like... specifics."  
Will was quiet for a few moments then said abruptly, "There's a town in Norway called Hell. I think it's in Norway, anyway. Maybe it's in Minnesota, for all I know. There could be a planet called Hell."  
Eve sighed. "Why are you so adamant about this alien thing?"  
"Why are you so adamant they're not? You don't want there to be life in the universe?"  
"It's not about what I want, it's about what is more _likely_. I think it'd just be easier for you to include aliens in your worldview than -"  
"Than _what_? What, Eve? You want me to believe that the slightly intimidating, but protective history professor is an evil demon from the depths of Hell itself? That Professor Fell, who is _inredibly_ gay, eats five star food constantly, and _probably_ slept with Oscar Wilde based on how he talks about him is an angel that just _decided_ to drop into this college to teach literature? That's the _believable_ option?"  
Eve sighed. "Well, when you put it like that... except they gave us holy water to defend ourselves..."  
Will rubbed his temple. "Which could be code for something. Look, I just..."  
"You don't want to know, do you?"  
When he opened his eyes he saw Eve considering him.  
"I - I don't know, Eve. Maybe I just can't deal with it right this second."

***

"Hey, Will!"  
Will groaned internally and paused, waiting for the student to catch up.  
For most of last semester, he and Josh had had an open line of communication about the immortals' weirdnesses. The thing was, he felt like he'd been slammed with more occult knowledge almost right from the start this time, and he wasn't sure he actually _wanted_ to stop and have a rational conversation about how fucking trippy his world was now.  
So he'd kind of been avoiding Josh the past month.  
He forced a smile at his kind of friend though. "Hey."  
"Been busy?" Josh asked, not quite covering his hurt.  
"Like you wouldn't believe," Will answered back. "I'm heading to class, actually..."  
"Will." Josh frowned. "What _is it_? Just spit it out."  
Will sighed and glanced around. Then he took Josh's arm and tugged him out of the crowds of students hurrying to their classes. "My life's just kind of been turned upside down, ok?"  
"Uh, yeah. You've been cavorting with immortals and have become a witch." Josh rolled his eyes.  
"Occultist," Will corrected automatically. "Like Anathema."  
"Same difference," Josh muttered.  
Will let go of him as they entered an empty classroom and he closed the door behind them.  
"You've been avoiding me," Josh accused once they were alone. "I can tell, you know."  
Will shrugged and sat on a desk. "Yeah. But, to be fair, I'm not even sure what is real anymore." He ran a hand through his hair and Josh came to sit next to him, quietly supportive.  
Will took a breath. "So... some guy was like creeping around the school, right? And Fell and Crowley didn't come to class, so we kind of told the guy to, you know, fuck off. We were safe," Will quickly assured when Josh's eyes went wide. "There're wards around campus apparently. So we're all safe. Though I was terrified afterward and didn't leave school grounds for a few days. Fell and Crowley then called us into Crowley's office and Crowley majorly freaked out about us going after the 'Duke of Hell' and he had his glasses off and his eyes were like a snake's and he had sharp fangs and he hissed his 's's like a goddamn _snake_ , and Fell just magicked some spray bottles onto the table and told us they were filled with actual fucking _holy water_ which apparently can protect against dukes of hell and Fell and Crowley had a 'talk' with the guy and hes not a worry anymore? And now we're trying to summon real fucking hellfire to protect ourselves and I don't even want to know what life is right now, you know?" Will's voice had risen until he was almost yelling, almost in hysterics.  
Josh put a very tentative hand on Will's arm. "Dude. What the fuck?"  
Will burst into laughter then, and it was a little hysterical and very much a release.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 It's important to note that the spell called for _Western Cedar_ , which is a purifying plant, and in a completely different genus that the Lebanon one. [return to text]
> 
> 2 Another important note is that the purifying sage is specifically _white sage_ , and that the herb in your kitchen lacks the necessary purity that is needed in such a spell. It is also important to note that white sage is endangered, and if one is doing such a spell, it should be substituted for another purifying plant or crystal, like Eucalyptus or pure quartz. [return to text]
> 
> 3 It was not. [return to text]
> 
> *********
> 
> I'm actually alive? Sorry for taking so long for the people reading this... considering the whole story is written I was hoping to avoid these kinds of breaks.


	10. Val

"We even got white sage for it this time! And _still_ nothing works," Allison complained to the group. She was sitting across from Val, but it wasn't in a romantic, look in your eyes kind of way. It was in the I accept we're dating and I'm not hiding it but I dont want to be overly public about it kind of way. That was fine, though. Val understood. "I just really think if _you_ were to join the attempt -"  
"No," Sophia reiterated. "I'm not doing any magic."  
"But you have the Sight!"  
"And I've seen enough." She tapped the sunglasses she was always wearing now. It was a sign of what it meant for a normal person to perceive things that weren't of this world.  
Eve shook her head. "I wish I saw what you do. Why would you block it?"  
She shrugged. "Stops me from getting headaches."  
"But you're seeing things as they _are_."  
"Yeah, and I take them off if I want to inspect things, but that much information all the time is too much, Eve. I don't need to be constantly aware of the wards and everyone's auras."  
"Eve won't be able to rest easy until she unravels all the mysteries of the universe," Will teased. "At least we know you'll be a good journalist." [1]  
Eve rolled her eyes. "If I could find out the mysteries of the universe, why wouldn't I?"  
Val raised an eyebrow. "What else do you need to know?"  
Eve stared at her aghast. "What do you mean? Don't you have more questions?"  
Val shrugged. "Not really." As far as she was concerned, everything made sense. There were immortals on their world, there was some kind of Hell dimension, and Crowley had been part of it so he was some kind of snake demon. Fell was on the opposite side so there was some kind of Heaven dimension too. If all _that_ existed, then there was definitely some sort of afterlife. Sure, there were probably specific names for everything, but it wasn't like that would change the basics. And she highly doubted if she asked The Professors they would just nod and say, "oh yes, it's the Jews who had it right this whole time, spot on the money in every respect", or the Greeks, or Buffy or what have you. In all likelihood, everyone had messed up somewhere, because that was just how these things went, and she'd find out the particulars when she died.  
"Eve, don't you want to join the effort?" Allison asked.  
Eve shook her head. "No thanks. I'm good not selling my soul."  
Allison rolled her eyes. "Professor Fell wouldn't give us stuff that required us to sell our soul."  
"Well, maybe that's why it's not working."  
"I doubt it," Val said. "We're missing something important, that's all. Like someone with already established magic abilities."  
"Nope," Sophia said quickly. "Not doing it."  
Val sighed.

***

"I feel like this is a waste of time," Val whispered.  
"It's a fun seminar," Allison hissed back. "I've read the Minoans may be what was referred to as Atlantis by Plato."  
"Wait, really?"  
"Yeah!" Allison beamed. "There are a lot of similarities between the very first Atlantis story and the Minoans of Crete, including the fact they suffered from floods."  
"Ok," Val allowed. "If we talk about Atlantis, I might have a good time."  
Allison squeezed her hand. "It'll be good. And we have cookies and coffee."  
Val sipped her cheap coffee. "That's something anyway."  
They quieted when Professor Crowley came in with the visiting archeologist. They were talking calmly, but the archeologist looked wary and on guard.  
As one probably should be with a demon. Maybe it was instinctive, a self preservation kind of thing. Val had definitely felt a little on edge at first, though it had been tempered by Sophia's assurances [2] but even that had pretty much disappeared. She was sure he _could_ be intimidating, but he kind of... wasn't.  
In any case, he helped her get set up, and everything ran perfectly smoothly, which wasn't a common occurence in these things, but seemed like the most mundane of The Professors' abilities. Things just worked around them, even things that shouldn't. Everyone got over it pretty quickly.  
Val pulled out her phone to play with while they listened to the seminar. It was hard to pay attention otherwise, but it was actually quite interesting. They did touch on the Atlantis myth, which was a very cool story involving a trip to Egypt and Plato over exaggerating most of the story to make people pay attention. Then they got to look at some ancient script, some of which was translated and some of which had no translation at all. Apparently, Linear A was yet to be deciphered.  
At least by human historians.  
Val felt herself tune out as she contemplated Professor Crowley. Did he know Linear A? He'd have been around at the time, so it was possible. But he did say often he didn't read, and, once the whole snake eye thing had been revealed, she'd rather assumed his vision was different from humans. Maybe reading was just hard for him.  
Professor Fell, on the other hand? With his love of literature, Val was going to bet he'd been reading since reading came about. He had probably read in Linear A at one point. Maybe he even still remembered it. She assumed their memory was either human like, with unused skills disappearing over time, or else had perfect recall. There was, then, a chance that Professor Fell could translate the weird hieroglyphics on the piece of pottery.  
The next question was, would he?  
True, they weren't exactly _hiding_ who they were, or at least the fact they weren't human, but they weren't exactly advertising their services, otherwise Sophia wouldn't need at least one other source for any piece of information she used in her essay, and there would be old doctorates lining up outside their doors to hear about specific points in history.  
_But_ they weren't above helping out students, or quietly sharing their knowledge. Nor did Val think they were totally aware of what was and wasn't known in the scientific communities.  
She spun her phone on the table, a vague plan coming together.  
"Val?"  
She started.  
Allison giggled. "How long have you been zoned out?"  
"Um... Linear A?"  
"Oh my god. That was like halfway through the seminar. I didn't think it was _that_ boring."  
"It wasn't, but listen. Do you think Professor Fell knows Linear A?"  
"Is that what you've been - oh my god. What if Professor Fell knows Linear A? Maybe he even knows Cretan Hieroglyphics." Allison's eyes went wide.  
"Knows what?"  
"Cret - it came up after you zoned out. Another language, even older."  
"Yeah, exactly!"  
Allison worried her lip. "Should we... ask? Do you think he'd decipher it for us?"  
Val grinned. "Follow my lead. And let's hope Professor Crowley thinks it's funny."  
"That's not a totally inane hope," Allison said, following Val down to where the speaker was packing up. Professor Crowley liked to play tricks on people, and his husband probably counted as 'people'.  
Val smiled at the speaker. "Hello Dr. Davies. I loved the seminar. I was really curious about Linear A? Has any of it been deciphered at all, if it's similar to Linear B?"  
"We have been able to, well, guess would be the most accurate term. A few symbols that are very similar to Linear B we can safely assume have the same meaning, but there's not enough for a full translation." She smiled. "Are you interested in ancient languages?"  
"Yes!" Allison piped up. "I think its fascinating. And the whole process of deciphering a completely new language. I kind of wish that's what I was doing sometimes, I wanted to go into linguistics when I was younger."  
"That's wonderful. What are you doing now?"  
"Journalism," Allison said. "It's the paying side of English and language."  
Dr. Davies laughed. "I suppose so."  
"You know," Val said. "There's a professor here who's great with old languages. Maybe he could take a look at it? It can't hurt, right?" She smiled at the disbelieving look from the speaker.  
"I doubt one of the teachers just happens to be able to decipher Linear A. No one has and it's been studied intensely."  
"No, I get that," Val agreed, because if she didn't know Professor Fell was immortal, she would be looking at herself like that too. "But sometimes he knows things you wouldn't expect. Can we at least try it, and if he can't help, no harm done."  
"Are you trying to get my husband to decipher an indecipherable language?" Professor Crowley had come over.  
"Uh huh," Val said, hoping he'd go for it.  
Professor Crowley smiled. "I love it. Let's go." He didn't wait for agreement, he just grabbed the pictures the speaker had brought and headed out the door.  
Val and Allison followed eagerly, while Dr. Davies went with a "wait a second!"  
Val caught up with Professor Crowley and took the papers from him. "You guys follow my lead though, alright?"  
Crowley grinned. "Sure. Stage is yours."  
Val looked to the speaker who sighed. "Fine! But this is ridiculous."  
Val beamed. "Just play along."  
She pushed into Professor Fell's office and schooled her face into polite interest.  
"Hi, Professor Fell?"  
The professor looked up from the book he was reading - an Oscar Wilde. [3]  
"Hello, Val, Allison. Can I help you with anything?"  
"Yeah, actually." She entered the room and put the pictures only in front of him. "Can you translate this? A friend of mine is working on a project for class, and I know you know some old languages. I thought maybe you could help out since it's due Friday."  
"Hmm." Aziraphale bent over the pictures. "This is for homework?"  
Val and Allie nodded, and after a second so did Dr. Davies.  
Aziraphale looked at it again, and seemed to make up his mind to trust them.  
Stupid decision, really.  
"Yes, I do know this. This is a simple sentence really, a log of grain sold."  
"Wait, really?" Dr. Davies went over.  
"Mmhmm. This one has a schedule of incoming shipments. Most old writing was strictly for keeping track of goods, you understand."  
Allison also went over. "So what's this symbol mean?"  
"That is the symbol for grain and is..."  
Val tuned it out and leaned against the wall, feeling incredibly smug.  
"Nicely done," Crowley said softly enough the group wouldn't hear.  
She grinned up at him. "I know you two have no idea what's common knowledge," she said just as quietly.  
He snorted. "That's true enough. You're too wily for your own good, you know."  
She beamed. "Are you gonna tell him?"  
"Oh yeah. I want to see his face."  
"I appreciate that."  
He rolled his eyes. "He's gonna have other people trying this now, you know that right?"  
"You know that this is going to help people learn a hell of a lot, right? I mean, I figure you're here to share knowledge."  
He shrugged. "Pretty much, yeah."  
"So there you are then." She paused. "You could share some witchcraft knowledge. Our spells are complete duds."  
"I don't know anything about witchcraft," Professor Crowley answered honestly. "I've never really interacted with any, other than Anathema."  
"Damn. I've talked to Anathema but she's about seeing ley lines and auras, not about actually _doing_ things."  
"Sorry."  
"It's fine," Val assured. "We'll figure out how to make it work."  
They quieted and looked at the trio bent over the pictures.  
"You realize this could last hours?" Crowley asked after a few moments.  
"I'm starting to get that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 The teasing was a front for the strain Val knew Will still felt. He'd bought some of his own holy water, and he'd spent a few nights at her dorm just to stay in the wards. Part of the reason he was pushing the magic was to feel safe, and Val could get that. She would like that safety too, despite the assurance of The Professors that everything was fine. [return to text]
> 
> 2 And the gay energy [return to text]
> 
> 3 No one could convince Val there hadn't been something there. Crowley always scowled when he saw Professor Fell with the books. [return to text]
> 
> ****
> 
> So... I've been thinking about adding this chapter in for a while, and when I got here I was like, shit. I kind of really want it for pacing and shit, so here it is! Still one more final chapter! :) Enjoy!


	11. Eve

Eve sighed. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised that she'd decided to write her review on theology. Why do extra research when she was already knee deep in it, after all. She felt like they were all slowly becoming experts in mythology and religion, all of which was really kind of the same thing in the end.  
Recently, of course, she'd moved from scattered mythology and narrowed onto a more specific topic: hell and all its mentions. Of course, "hell" could be reinterpreted in other contexts, but "Duke of Hell" led straight to Abrahamic interpretations of the universe.  
Eve wouldn't say she was an atheist, but she also didn't ever actually go to church. She didn't exactly believe in genesis, either, but had always felt the idea of a God, in a vague not very involved way, made sense. Even with all of that, being confronted by the idea that Hell might be _real_ , that actual _demons_ walked around campus, that if there was another side actual fucking _angels_ might be real too, was a slap in the face with a cold fish.  
Anyway, she'd been doing a lot of reading about dukes and princes and presidents of hell, and while Wikipedia didn't mention a "Hastur", she had more faith in Professor Crowley than a centuries old text based on a translation of various older texts.  
Especially since she wasn't reading the actual text but a Wiki summary.  
Unfortunately, Sophia was busy with her thesis, and the coven was busy with self protection, which was really their way to avoid actually poking at what exactly Crowley and Fell were. That way led to even worse realizations, earth shattering kind of stuff. It wasn't like you had to be a biblical scholar to connect god and serpents to the Garden of Eden, and they weren't quite ready to find out if it was a real thing.  
Eve wished they were. She was trying to bring herself to the acceptancce of angels as a thing, a thing that had let genocides and wars continue unabated. She was trying to wrap her mind around immortals.  
She would even forced her mind to wrap around a young Earth created in seven days if that was the truth of the world, because Eve would rather have the existential crisis than live in lies.  
But the rest of the group hadn't reached there yet. - There were more snakes alluded to in the Bible, probably, they said. Some kind of sub species of demon, no doubt. There must be loads of them. At least angels were there aplenty, theoretically.  
It really was a Romeo and Juliet story.  
No wonder they were constantly looking over their shoulders.  
Eve sighed and closed her laptop. She wasn't getting anywhere. All she was getting today was more questions, a headache, and an oncoming existential crisis.  
She quietly put her laptop into her bag and left the library, sighing at the late hour. She _hated_ leaving around five on a Friday, but she'd really needed to get her work done, and better to do it on campus than at home where everyone would try to interrupt.  
It wasn't like she could actually tell them what was on her mind.  
She headed towards the parking lot, head tilted back to gaze at the sky. The stars weren't visible through the light that spilled from the buildings and shone from the street lamps, but she could see the full moon looking down at her and it was pleasant and quiet as she walked.  
"- agreed on non-interference."  
Eve froze.  
That was Professor Fell. She peered into the teacher lot that was just adjacent to the student one she'd parked in, and could just make out the halo of curls that let her know the professor was definitely there.  
"We did." The voice was smooth, cultured.  
_Suited pricks_.  
"And then there was Samandriel."  
She snuck closer to see if she could catch a glimpse.  
Professor Fell stood next to his husband's Bentley. On one side of him stood a man ramrod straight in a grey suit. On the other stood a diminutive person with flies buzzing around their head.  
"And Hazztur," said the fly person.  
_Both sides,_ she thought.  
"Unless you've come up with something new, you're wasting all our time." Professor Fell looked less scared and more annoyed. If she hadn't seen the anxiety that cloaked him in previous moments, she would have believed he was merely bored.  
"You know, I've been thinking about that," the prick said. "I saw one of you survive hellfire."  
"And only one zzzzurvived holy water," the fly person (demon?) said. "I zzzink we have dizzzzcovered your trick, Azzziraphale."  
Fell gave the demon an unimpressed look. "Have you, then? I'd just love to hear the theory."  
Eve crept back. She couldn't just _watch_. They were threatening _Professor Fell_. She wasn't going to let these assholes bother her people. Especially not for falling in love.  
The nice thing about electric cars, besides their climate friendly affect and low cost of fuel, was that they were completely silent. Sophia had been so enamoured by that, caught on how relaxing the drive was compared to usual.  
And also on how much more likely you would be to get hit by one.  
Eve climbed into her car and manuevered it out of her lot, keeping the lights off and the speed low enough that the vehicle made zero sound as it crept towards the parking lot where Professor Fell was cornered.  
Out of curiosity, she also lowered the window, which meant she heard the sound of liquid being tossed, and the tired sigh of her professor as he said, "I'm not a demon. And now my outfit is all wet."  
"Just making sure." The prick sounded like he was smiling, but he was _just_ out of reach.  
Normally Eve wouldn't be for running people over with her car. But this guy was a prick, he was dangerous, he was threatening Professor Fell, and she was 99% certain it wouldn't kill him anyway.  
Then a large plume of fire appeared beyond the Bentley and Eve bit her lip to stifle a cry. They couldn't kill Professor Fell. That was just _wrong_.  
"If you're _quite_ done," came an annoyed voice that she knew all too well, and she felt herself sag in relief. He was fine. Of course he was fine.  
The prick took a step back, into range.  
Eve floored the pedal as he gasped, "what _are_ you?"  
The car accelerated faster than it really should have been able to, but the prick noticed and tried to side step. "Tried", because her arm jerked at the last moment and sent her straight into the prick at 70 km per hour.  
She hit the brake hard and screeched to a stop, which felt like it, too, happened too fast. She ended up perfectly in line with Professor Fell and the fly demon.  
The plume of fire went out.  
"What izzz this?" The fly demon demanded.  
Eve struggled to push the passenger door open, then grab her holy water sprayer and aim it at the demon.  
"I'm afraid it's time for me to go," Professor Fell said, straightening his bow tie as if completely unruffled. "I hope we don't have to repeat this scene."  
"Go?" The word started out shocked and ended up angry. A long knife appeared in the demon's hand.  
"I have holy water and I'm not afraid to use it!" Eve had finally gotten herself into position and she jiggled the spray bottle to illustrate her point.  
The demon took several steps back. "What have you done, Azzzziraphale?"  
"What we should have been doing all along," Professor Fell said primly. "Protecting humanity. I wouldn't try anything, I gave her the holy water, you see."  
The demon looked between them, and the flies grew more restless. But they didn't come closer.  
"I trust we won't have anymore problems, my dear," Professor Fell said. "Crowley is much less forgiving."  
Professor Fell stared them down, and the demon stared back and the moment stretched out like a wire. Eve felt her arm tremble slightly from the strain of the stress and nerves, the whole scene endless.  
"We should dizzzcorporate the both of you," the demon hissed. "You would make lezzzz problems azzzz a spirit."  
"Well, that is a rather unfortunate stance."  
Neither moved. The demon stayed out of range of the sprayer, and Professor Fell stayed within it.  
"Professor!" Eve called, hoping to break the stale mate. "We should get Professor Crowley!"  
They both looked at her and she firmed her arm and glared at the demon, brandishing her weapon. The demon glared back, and, yeah, she could admit she was probably going to be having nightmares for a while. But she was facing down a _demon_. She was allowed.  
"Quite right, my dear girl," Professor Fell said with a nod. "He will be rather worried." He headed toward the car and Eve released a breath.  
"Thizzzzz isn't over, Azzzziraphale! You should have left that angel to fazzze judgement, and we might have left the non-interferenzzzze agreement alone!"  
Professor Fell sat in the passenger seat and closed the door, actively ignoring the demon. Instead he turned to Eve with a smile. "Why don't I take that and you can concentrate on steering?"  
She nodded and handed it over, then drove. She kept looking back at the demon, who glared after them as she headed back towards campus.  
When they were out of sight, Professor Fell collapsed in relief, but in a very prim way where he still somehow managed to maintain perfect posture.  
"So," Eve said after a few moments of silence. "That's another demon I've managed to piss off."  
"Indeed," Professor Fell said. "You do have a knack for it. Thank you, dear girl, I'm afraid I needed the rescue."  
She smiled at him. "No worries." She pulled to a stop when she reached the front of the building, where Professor Crowley was already standing.  
A very concerned frown filled his face when he saw them, and he strode over quickly.  
"What's wrong?"  
Professor Fell gave him a smile. "Everyone's quite alright, darling. As is your car. Eve has offered to drive us home tonight after I ran into Gabriel and Beelzebub."  
Crowley went stone still. Then he climbed in the back, which was noteworthy because Eve, a little frozen on hearing the names, hadn't unlocked it yet.  
"What happened?" Crowley demanded.  
"I'll explain when we get home," Professor Fell promised, and it reminded Eve that she really needed to start driving.  
Crowley did not look pleased, but they drove in silence, barring the occasional direction from Professor Fell. Aziraphale.  
Hmm.  
Eve pulled up in front of the loveliest cottage. The plants were perfect, no doubt through a combination of fear and care. The cottage itself was cute and small and homey looking.  
"Why don't you come in for some tea, dear?" Professor Fell offered. "You've had quite a fright."  
She smiled. "Thank you, that'd be nice."  
Eve followed them into the cottage which was amazing on the inside too. There were a few bookshelves, but Eve knew full well most of Professor Fell's collection was still in Soho. Mostly there were plants and memories, and it all felt so safe and comfortable.  
Crowley led her to a seat at the table and sprawled on the chair across from her, while Professor Fell went into the kitchen to busy himself with the tea.  
Eve stared between them. Beelzebub was a _well known_ demon. A prince, if her research was accurate. That was high level stuff. And Gabriel? It couldn't be _Archangel_ Gabriel, could it? Had she run over an archangel with her car? Holy shit, she was going to hell so severely.  
"You can ask, you know."  
She looked at Crowley. His voice was gentle, coaxing.  
"Can I?"  
She swallowed when a slow smile spread across his face, revealing sharp teeth.  
"Don't you want to? I can see it." Crowley's position shifted, sinuous as the snake he had to be. Now he was leaning on the table, looking at her, into her soul it felt like, and there was an apple in his hand, offered to her like a sacrifice. "All you have to do is want to know."  
Eve stared at the apple, the offer of knowledge. Would she doom humanity again if she took it? And was knowledge really such a doom? She raised her gaze to his face to meet his eyes but ran into his sunglasses.  
She reached out and took them off, and he didn't move. His pupils contracted to slits, and she stared into his golden eyes.  
Eve swallowed. "Knowledge is always worth it."  
His smile grew as she took the fruit. "I have always thought the same."  
Eve took a bite of the apple, and something in the world changed. Maybe it was that names had power. Maybe it was how purely human Eve was. Or maybe it was that Crowley had given another apple of knowledge to humanity, not only symbolically, but regularly through his actions.  
Whatever it was, something in the world changed. Eve felt a shudder go down her spine. Scales briefly appeared on Crowley's neck.  
(On campus, her friends purify water for the first time)  
(In Jasmine Cottage later that night, Anathema Device sees her first vision)  
Aziraphale came out of the kitchen, bearing three mugs of tea on a tray, and a soft smile. "Ah, so that's what happened," he said, a note of awe in his voice as he served the tea. He sat down next to his husband and beamed as Crowley wrapped an arm around him. "That takes me back. You know, we met for the first time on the walls of the garden, after Crowley tempted Eve into taking the apple."  
Crowley squeezed him. "And you gave away your sword and lied straight to God about it."  
Aziraphale chuckled. "That too, I suppose."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Thanks for sticking with it, I hope you enjoyed it. :) Feel free to let me know what you thought!


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